Narcissists, Sociopaths, and Cheating

Sociopaths cheat because they can...they take what they want because they want it, and they have no moral issues that they are concerned with. Since they do not  recognize rules, and simply believe that they are above the rules. They do not think much about their behaviors and they believe they can do no wrong, so the rules don't apply to them. 

Like narcissists, sociopaths are indifferent/unconcerned to the damage they do to innocent people.

To a sociopath, cheating is like a game where he/she maneuvers an individual into giving him/her what he/she wants and it has no special meaning to them. Although the sociopath will do everything to make you think otherwise....they are skillful con-artist. They will say everything they know you want to hear. They will make you believe you are special, irresistible, and everything they could ever want. But the truth is, they see you as an appliance, that they will only use when they want to. 

Narcissists and Sociopaths, will both wreak havoc and destruction on the lives of the people they encounter. Especially preying on innocent, kind and good hearted people.

There is only one way to deal with them once you have discovered that they are this way.  Get far, far away from them, and fast! NO CONTACT!  When you do this with a narcissist, they will try very hard to get back in your life (as their ego is sensitive to rejection)

Of course they say all the perfect things you have been wanting to hear. But once you let them back in, the bad behaviors like passive aggression, emotional neglect and abuse, and betrayal will start again. This vicious cycle that will never end, unless you cut out all forms of communication. They will do things to hurt you even more, once they realize that you have gone No Contact. 

For example; trying to make you jealous, telling mutual friends how glad they are to be rid of you, while also talking about how much fun they are having or new relationships they are in. IGNORE IT. And don’t try to hurt in them in return. That will waste your time and energy. 

The narcissistic sociopath is going to do everything in their power to destroy you, your reputation, your job, your friendships, and your happiness. They will try to annihilate the very fiber of your being. 

My other post have plenty of information about the different tactics that the narcissists and sociopaths use in order to try and destroy you. Stay Strong. 

Dealing with these Monsters is hard. You will feel like you are fighting for your life. **But remember their goal is to wear and tear you down. 

When your ex is trying to destroy reputation

When we have been abused, betrayed, lied to, cheated on, had rumors spread about us, lost friends, felt isolated, been afraid, lost everything, doubted ourselves, felt guilty, believed it was our fault - more than likely we were in a relationship with a sociopath. Or we were friends, or have a sociopathic family member.  

Once we discovered the truth, and realized we are not the only victim of this person, who had some how destroyed our life, our soul, and left us with little to no trust in the world. We are able to begin healing from the traumatic experience. Healing takes time. We are weak, alone, afraid, and don't know who we can trust.

The hardest part of healing is feeling safe and facing the world. 

When my sociopath spread rumors about me all over town — to my child's school, to my neighbors, to people who i respected in the community. I was afraid to leave the house. I was afraid of what others were thinking about me. What lies had my sociopath told everyone? And did anyone believe those lies. My sociopath had a reputation in town already, so why would people believe the lies that they were spreading?

I felt that people would rather believe the bad they have heard about you - rather than the good. It seems people don't go around talking about the good about you. But they will go around talking about anything bad about you. 

For a while I truly felt isolated from the world. I did not want to go out of my home. 

Even though the people who knew me, knew the hardships I had been through with my ex. They new that my ex wanted to hurt me, and make my life unbearable. So far my ex was doing a pretty good job. 

I never went and spoke with a therapist, even though it may have helped. I just focused on my children, and getting my life back. It wasn't easy. When the sociopath still would talk badly of me, any chance that arose. 

When I went no contact and chose to ignore my sociopath, that's when things got very ugly. I refused to communicate with the ex. So my ex decided to tell everyone, and put it on social media that i was a "cyber stalking troll". Even using my first and last name to slander me. My ex made up a fake domain site in my name. Pretending to be me, and impersonating me in an unfavorable manner.  Basically painting a picture of a very unstable person, that was trying to get help for my mental problems. The worst part was if you googled my name, the website that my ex started about me was the first thing that came up. That is  when I said “ENOUGH IS ENOUGH.”

I contacted a friend of mine whose husband is a police officer. And I ask what could be done about this website that my ex started about and was impersonating me in such a way. It was slander and defamation.

My friends husband informed me that it was cyber stalking, and I should file a police report. — so I did that. Which only made my ex crazier. Although the website was taken down, I was now being accused of more horrific things. 

I wondered if this crap would ever stop. I felt hopeless... I began to stop looking online, and begin to focus only on myself my children and healing. It was very tempting to want to get online and see what my ex was saying now.but I never did. I gave it a good eight months before I looked at anything my ex was doing online. I still do not look up my ex'a online activity. 

The psychopaths intention...

Any individual who is being targeted is usually unaware of the psychopath’s true intention. 

Psychopaths also look for those who will “invest” in a relationship with them.  Usually the target feels that something is just not right and things may feel wrong.  However, in the absence of any solid reasons or evidence as to why things do not feel right, the relationships, whether romantic, business, or otherwise, will often continue.  The simple passage of time can further deepen the connections and perceived obligations to the psychopath.  

It may seem that victims are weak, but this is not the case.  Normal human vulnerability should not be confused with weakness.  Anyone has the potential to be targeted.  Psychopathic individuals do not appear to care whom or what they use or ultimately destroy.