Tuesday, August 18, 2015

Oh the passive aggressive.... 😒

Narcissist, sociopaths, and the rest of the character disturbed individuals walking amongst us, are all emotional manipulators. What I have noticed in my years of dealing with these people, is that they all play the victim. Some may truly believe that they really are a victim of everyone else. 
They contribute everything in their life that has not gone the way they wanted it to, to be the fault of someone else. These people NEVER take responsibility for anything! They go through life blaming, accusing, hurting, refusing, arguing, hating, cheating, and lying. Their life seems to be one mishap after the next, yet they never question their own self, for these repetitive patterns of misery. They are hard wired to switch the blame onto others. They will cause the people involved with them to doubt their self and their sanity. Do not feel gullible or stupid if you have fallen prey to this kind of twisted manipulation. Normal and stable people are always the best victims for these types of people, because we are HUMAN, and have REAL HUMAN EMOTIONS. The important thing is that you realize that you are not to blame for the behaviors, actions, and insecurities of another person.
You are only responsible for your own behaviors. 

What I have seen in sociopaths and narcissist, is that they are 100% and fully aware of what they are doing to people. 
They are confident in their manipulation tactics. They see others as objects, not as human beings made up of flesh and blood with feelings and emotions. They don't feed anything for the pain they cause. In fact, they intentionally cause the pain, and enjoy keeping others on their toes, and walking on egg shells. They like to play games with their victims . They get some kind of sick pleasure of causing emotional turmoil, and devastation.

The Passive Aggressive Disordered individual on the other hand may have a conscience. In my own personal opinion, which is based on what I have seen and had the misfortune of interacting with. Is that the passive aggressive disordered person is an extremely insecure, broken person.
They do what they do because they live in fear of everything and everyone.
They are scared to be hurt, left, abandoned, alone, rejected, etc...
Passive aggressives are some of the most frustrating people to deal with because you never know what is genuine and what is not. So you find yourself questioning everything they say and do.
You  do not know what their true agenda is. It really sucks to have to wonder if the only reason they are doing something nice things for you, is so they can throw it in your face later...

It is exhausting! Dealing with a passive aggressive spouse can make one feel insane, angry, and hopeless. It's hard to leave one because you actually probably do feel sorry for them deep down, because you know they are NOT soulless and evil, like the sociopath. You see that there is pain behind their eyes. You know that you cannot heal that pain, and you know that they will not ever talk about the pain that is causing them to be this way. They deny being passive aggressive. It seems they blame YOU for everything wrong with their life. You know that you are not to blame, and you wonder if they really feel you are. Have they forgotten the others in their past that they blamed before you...? The passive aggressive is always going to flip anything you confront them with, deny and blame you. They are masters at making everything your fault. 
After so long, you stop confronting, you stop believing, you stop trying and you stop caring...  
It has become pointless to even try to help this person. Since they really feel they are the victim of your anger and demands.

Unlike the sociopath and narcissist, the passive aggressive really feels like the victim. Yes,  they do play the victim well, and you know it is all crap. But in their mind, they actually believe they are genuine victims of anyone closely involved with them. They yearn to be loved, yet they alienate those who love(d) them with their inability to take responsibility for ANYTHING.

Passive aggressive people simply want you to feel sorry for them, because they actually really feel sorry for themselves, and they need someone to make them feel valid in their feelings. If you do not sympathize with the passive aggressive, they just feel more victimized and become more shut down.
If you don't sympathize with the sociopath, they throw you out like garbage and will find someone else who will. They quickly move on to their next victim who will buy their lies and bullsh*t.

The sociopath, plays the part of the victim but remains aware that being the Victim will be beneficial to them in getting their way. 
The sociopath knows that good people will feel pity for them, and they can use that guilt to manipulate. The sociopath is depending on others ability to feel guilt. Since the sociopath him/herself lacks that ability to feel guilt. Due to the fact that they are without a conscience or soul. 


  1. "They are scared to be hurt, left, abandoned, alone, rejected, etc..."

    If this is true about passive aggressive disorder individual... then why do CONSTANTLY act in ways that make people want to exit their lives.. I've never understood that..

  2. I hear ya! They are the eternal victim of everyone... They are insecure people, and obviously there is something not right upstairs. Healthy functional people talk, connect, share.. PA's live completely in denial! It's very frustrating, because you begin to question everything. You feel they have a hidden agenda. That makes you feel crazy!
    With the sociopath, you know you are dealing with someone with no moral compass or conscience. With passive aggressive, you know they have a soul somewhere, you just can't get them to ever open up, so you can see it.
    It's so time wasting, because in a relationship with PA, you always have that small ounce of hope... They give you just enough to keep you around, making you feel as if it's either your fault or they are capable of change. Honestly I don't think they can.
    How can one change when they don't believe they even have a problem...

  3. They cannot change nor do they want to.Nature vs Nurture...The Sociopaths brain is not wired correctly. Did you ever see a Sociopaths brain on Magnetic Renosance Imaging and a view of a normal brain.whoaaaaa.if they are predisposed to be a Sociiopath and their parents or one of they are horribly mistreated and unemotionally present. Feeling unloved and rejected must truly suck.They carry this behavior into adulthood, have children and spouse and there goes the roller coaster a neverending cycle. Life is exactly like a rollercoaster with a Sociopath feeling good which dont last very long. And well you know the rest. No Contact is the best thing you can do for your future...😍