The Sociopath never stops being obsessed

Does the narcissistic sociopath ever give up on making your life miserable.

I do not think will. They will have distractions come along the way, that may give you a small amount of peace. But I have been stalked, had profiles made up about my online, been signed up spam mail, I have even received hand written letters at my home mail box. That was when I had a security system installed. But I say once again, even though there is no communication, contact with my sociopath stalker. It’s still costing me money.

The way I see it, I have dealt with this for a 13+ years. And I have gained knowledge. And the sociopath hasn’t gained anything. (Except for maybe special place in hell). But my life is good. I have been through so much, but I am still fairly young. I have a loving family and supportive friends. I am active in my community. I play tennis, I am involved with many organization that i enjoy and have interest in. I have finally found the job of my dreams.  I am happy.

Everything I have been through has made me a stronger person. 10 years ago I was unable to say this.  I was constantly upset about the problems the sociopath was causing for me. Because I did not have the knowledge to know how to deal with it appropriately. That is why i started this blog. In hopes people wouldn’t make the same mistakes that I did. Or just help others that find themselves in a hopeless miserable situation like this.

It’s not your fault. I am able to be happy, despite everything that has happened. The fact that my sociopath is still to this very day obsessing over me, tells me that this person is so miserable with their life. And this is all they have to do. The sociopath is truly unhappy and miserable. There is no spark within them. Especially as they age. My sociopath is older than me by 20 years. It’s obviously that she is very miserable. All her other targets and victims have died. I’m the only one left living. So she gets online and makeups Facebook profiles in my real name. She doesn’t have any friends. Her own sister won’t even speak to her. And she basically ran her mother into an early grave.

I haven’t posted anything in a while. Because I just haven’t felt the need to. Until I came across something she made up on Facebook about me. I laughed about it. It told me all I already knew. That she has nothing else to do with her time. And no one else wants anything to do with her.

Yes, I wish she would leave me alone. But she isn’t going to. She is obsessed, miserable and jealous. She wants to upset me and cause me pain. But because of her I will say I am a stronger person than ever.

Recovery and healing

Some people are fascinated with sociopaths... I am not one of those people.

To me there is nothing fascinating about a person who is evil. There is nothing special about a person who hurts everyone that is “nearest and dearest” to them. Maybe people are fascinated because they understand so little about these ruthless individuals. I doubt they have been the victim of one or targeted. If they were, they would not be so fascinated with them. 

Sociopaths are bad people. They have bad intentions. They are aware of the misery they cause, yet they don't give a damn. 

I don't like to call myself a victim of a narcissistic sociopath. I prefer to think I am a survivor.

It has taken some time to heal, and recover, but I like to think I have come a long way from where I was about 7 years ago. None of it has been easy, there was a time when I believed that nothing would ever be “ok” again. I was completely hopeless. I felt that I didn't even know who I was anymore. I was so lost I even questioned my own morals, wondering what did I do, there has to be an explanation why someone would do these awful things to me. 

I have suffered. I admit I have felt like nothing mattered anymore. Because of my bad decision to marry a snake, my life would never be happy, I would never find peace.

What happened to me? 

I have felt just about every emotion one can feel. I was depressed, then I was angry. I was exhausted mentally and physically. I was hopeless. I was scared, alone, and living in fear. 

I have been through it all. I have had to really look at myself, my real self. I didn't always see what I liked. What my ex sociopath did isn't important to me anymore. The things I lost are no longer important to me either. 

What matters most to me is the here and the now. I continue to take things one day at a time. 

Once I stopped feeling like a was a victim and I started looking at myself, I learned that I was responsible for myself and my feelings. It is up to me to establish boundaries with people, and walk away from people and situations that make me feel belittled and taken advantage of. What has happened in the past is over and done. Can't change any of that. But I can learn from it all. No matter how much I do not like what I have been through, I do believe there is a bigger learning experience in it. Eveything happened the way it happened because that was the way it was meant to be. It really is what it is. 

Accepting that everything that happens, happens so for a reason, and even though I don't know what that reason is, I have to trust that it is the way it is suppose to be. 

Trusting that everything is the way it is suppose to be, is what made me realize that I do not have to be a victim anymore.

Being a victim was a not a choice, but being a survivor is. 

I know now I AM NOT THE PERSON I use to be. I am much more than the person I use to be. I am stronger now, I have lived through something that forced me to look at myself, my flaws, my insecurities, and as ugly as they were at times, there was a reason I had to go through this.