The narcissist lives in a meaningless wasteland

Narcissist people are deceptive liars. Being with a narcissist is painful, and at times you can feel like you are the crazy one! When you are not aware of what narcissism is. Having little knowledge of personality disorders, such as a sociopathic, psychopathic, and narcissistic, makes you feel like there is something wrong with you. The narcissist is so quick to lie, and will put all the blame on you, leaving you feeling guilty for even confronting them. This can be confusing for the person who feels they are being betrayed and lied to. Eventually the persons self esteem begins to erode away. They don't understand why they are ignored, and put down. They believe something is wrong with them. So they try even harder to please the narcissist. 

Only to be more rejected by the narcissist. 

So why would a person continue to stay in a relationship that is so emotionally abusive and damaging to their personal growth? 

I believe it stems from the person being rejected by a parent, or from many rejections in their past. Rejection hurts the rejected person so badly, they feel  as long as the narcissist hasn't left them yet, that feel that they can change the narcissist, and one day the narcissist will see how much they care for them, and the narcissist will change. 

Unfortunately this will never happen...  

Narcissistic personalities CANNOT and will not ever change. They have an ego so large, it doesn't allow them to see anything but the superficial, and what is most beneficial for them and their ego. 

Narcissist Do Not think there is anything wrong with them. If a narcissist seeks therapy, it is only because they have been forced, by someone who financially supports them or holds some other power over them. They will never genuinely try to get help, because they don't think they need help.  They believe that the problem is not them. They are perfect. The problem is everyone else.  Specifically they think the people who are asking them to seek professional help. The person most affected by the narcissist is his spouse or significant other. 

To the rest of the world the narcissist will portray himself as the nice guy, and can usually get along with anyone. The narcissist has no real sense of who he or she is.  

Narcissist are compulsive liars. These people have made such a habit out of lying, their entire existence is built solely on lies. They live a life of deceit. Narcassist (and sociopaths) live in an a false reality that they start to believe. They lie about anything and everything. They are making it up as they go. They will go to extremes to lie. Anything from lying about where they work, (in an attempt to make it seem like they are hard working, interesting people - which they are not) They are actually lazy individuals who are looking for a handout. 

A narcissist will lie about everything. They become such bold liars, they will make up things that can be easily proved wrong. For example, the narcissist says things that they believe will make then look good, like they wrote a book and got the book published, and it was on the NY times best seller, but all the money the book made, she/he donated to the neo-natal unit at the hospital. Why would someone lie about something like this? Since it can be proved that it isn't true? It's because they have lied so long, and no one has ever held them accountable, they see themselves as invisible to being caught. So they tell the most extreme lies.  Most psychiatrist call these people “delusional”. 

It is the person in a relationship with this disordered individual that suffers the most. Being with a pathological liar can ruin your life and the lives of those around you. 

So what is the reason narcissist lies?

It is complicated but quite simple to understand why the narcissist and the sociopath habitually lies to everyone. First and foremost they are in love with themselves.. 

Since they usually don't have much truth that verifies how wonderful they are. They must make up their own truth. Narcissist also never want to be wrong, so if they have to lie in order to prove they are right then they have no qualms about doing so. Narcissist also feel entitled to have whatever they want. If lying gets them what they want then they will not think twice about lying. Lying comes so natural to these types of personalities. It's second nature to them.  Narcissists must make every situation all about them.. 

The narcissist never thinks to himself, “how will this impact the people in my life?”  The narcissist will never worry about the consequences of lying. 

Narcissist are so shallow that they cannot see any further than their own nose. They only focus on the immediate gratification they want. Narcissists like sociopaths are always looking for the easy way out of a situation. 

The truth is the narcissist will never have a healthy relationship with anyone. It is impossible to have a long-term, healthy relationship built on mutual trust and honesty with a narcissist because they are all compulsive liars and they live such a shallow existence.  They are never able to accept that all their failed relationships is because of their own flawed personality. They believe they are perfect.

Narcissist are essentially only in a relationship with themselves. 

The narcissist is actually a coward. They lack the courage to look at the truth. Anyone who believes that they do not have to accept any responsibilty for anything in their life, is a coward. Narcassists are covert cowards. Narcissist will say what they think will get them back on good graces with a person, but as soon as you accept a narcissist back. It is not long before they are back to doing what led to you trying to end the relationship in the first place.  Liars are very hard to love. They will perpetually frustrate you. Instead of admitting their flaws, shortcomings, and their failures  {which is what makes us human} The narcissist will lie in order to cover it up. They’re so busy keeping up appearances that they destroy their closest relationships in the process. Narcissist rarely (I'm talking about RARELY - almost never) will change. It takes courage to admit wrong, and a narcissist is a coward. So they will always live a lifestyle of deceit and denial. 

Narcissist live meaningless lives.

If everything in your life was suddenly taken away from you. Like your fancy car, nice home, your high paying career...  What do you have besides your good name or your reputation? Narcassistic people have essentially burned all bridges and alienated everyone they have ever known.  They have lied and deceived so many people and caused so much emotional damage. 

They eventually self destruct and destroy their own reputations. They have ruined their own name in the community. 

Narcissist never form any real connections with anyone. The narcissists life becomes nothing more than a meaningless wasteland. As they age they  are easily forgotten and dismissed. No one with any real discernment will trust them. The narcissist will end up isolated and ostracized in their lifestyle of lies and deceit. 

Even then, they are unable to see why their life has ended up so miserable... They blame their pathetic life on their last lover, or on their parents, or on the “asshole” boss who fired them and couldn't see their potential. It's always someone else's fault. 

If you suspect you are in a relationship with someone who is a narcassist, get out now. It will save you a lot of heart ache and disappointment to leave sooner than later. They will never change. You cannot change them. No one can.

The Borderline Psychopath

The female sociopath can be the most difficult and exhausting of personality disordered women to deal with. "Borderline psychopath" is usually the diagnosis a psychiatrist will give to the female sociopath. Female sociopaths are much more spiteful, vindictive and manipulation than their male counterpart. Women are 3 times more likely to be diagnosed as a “borderline psychopath” than men. 

Borderline psychopaths are mean, conniving, hateful, vengeful, superficial, ruthless and dangerous. They are the like sociopaths, having no conscience, no remorse, and no empathy for life, but the borderline psychopath is worse. 

They want to be in control and are demanding. Most of them are attention seekers. Any relationship (lovers, family or the few friends the sociopath may have) are constantly having to deal with the consequences of “knowing” this unstable & unpredictable woman. They create problems, they stir up drama, and they never take responsibility for their behaviors. 

Female sociopaths are relentless, they will tear the victim to shreds given over time. Their goal is destroy the persons self esteem, and confidence. So that they can more easily control and influence their victim.

It's very hard to deal with these types. The best way is to not deal with them. Be courteous if you were to see them, but limite any contact with them. If they are trying to contact you, they will use any strategy they can think of to get you to respond. If you have children with this person (God bless your soul) then you can expect them to make up lies about the children to try to guilt you to respond to them. *Remember most everything they tell you will BE A LIE, it's just a desperate attempt to get you to talk to them*. Why? 

Because it's all about control. If you are limiting your contact with the borderline psychopath. They are not in control of you. They want to have that control of you. Either because at one time they had that control, and they feel you are a possession they rightfully own. They don't see you as a human being. But more as an object to be used to their expense. The best thing for you to do is ignore them and have little to No contact with them. This doesn't necessarily mean they will leave you alone, a good friend of mine still receives 10-20 text messages a day from his borderline psyhotic ex wife. And he hasn't responded in over 2 years. Yet her relentlessness and desperation continues. Everything from one of the kids have depression due to his lack of responding, to cancer. Yet he does not fight with her, he just refuses to be manipulated and controlled. From the kids point of view they would never see their parents fighting. The borderline psychopath has more than likely told the children that their father will not get along with her and she is trying so hard to get along with him - poor poor victim - she is always the victim. When the reality is, he is simply limiting his contact. The borderline psychopath will try every trick she can to get a response. 

The borderline psychopath and the sociopathic female will spread all kinds of lies and nasty rumors (this is something she is notorious for) and she has usually been doing this since  childhood.  She is an accomplished liar and professional cheater, she is always looking for the easier road to travel (she is lazy). Her kind of personality does not know anything about honesty. They have perfected conniving and manipulation with a malicious intent. 

Female sociopaths have an uncanny ability to find a character flaw in their target that can be exploited to destroy whoever they feel is a threat to their control and power. 

Women are usually more co-operative and caring. But not the female sociopath (borderline psychopath). They do not feel any empathy towards their victims. They do not feel bad about bullying and destroying people. They are seeking dominance and control. Women are usually mothers, nurturers and caregivers. Not the female sociopath.

Many people do not realize how emotionally and mentally damaging this particular type of woman can be. She is cold hearted and ruthless, while pretending to be so compassionate. She will always tell her sad story. Like how her mother neglected her as a child, and her ex husband was an abusive alcoholic who took advantage of her kindness. If you think you might be dealing with one of these women, watch how she claims to be the victim of everyone else, but notice how aggressive she is going about it. 

Real Victims are not aggressive and vengeful. Real victims are focused on how they heal from the abuse they suffered. They are not looking for pity or retribution. Real victims are looking for peace of mind and recovery. Real victims rarely talk about how they were abused, and rarely mention their abusers name. 

While the borderline psychopath is looking to defame and destroy the reputation of their victim by vilifying them and accusing them of heinous and horrific behaviors. Usually the borderline psychopath will accuse their victim of acts that they themselves are guilty of. I.E. — stalking, cyber bullying, obsession, verbal abuse, impersonation, character assassination, etc.... 

Female Sociopaths are difficult to spot because most of them are incredibly good at hiding their true self and their motives. It is really difficult to believe the extent that the sociopath will go to, in order to destroy their target. The dirty tricks and unproven rumors that female sociopath/borderline psychopath  regularly uses against their victims can be devastating. 

The female sociopath is an out of control individual, she manipulates and punishes at will. Unfortunately the female sociopath is described as the vindictive or alienating abusive ex-wife. Who uses the children to manipulate and control her ex-husband. The children are passed around to relatives and friends like a rag doll, in order to keep them away from their father, only so the sociopath can say what a shit father he is. Until the sociopath gets what she wants she will use her children against their father, in another desperate attempt to gain control over him. 

Unfortunately this does not end when the children are of legal age, the female sociopath will still try to use them against her ex-husband, even when they are adults. Most cases I have seen either end with the adult children seeing what their mother is doing and eventually they will refuse to have anymore contact with her.  Or sadly, they fall into the trap the mother has set, and the father has no relationship with his adult children. 

The children who take the side of  their sociopathic mother can end up as crazy as she is. On a positive note, the father usually ends up ok, despite a few psychological wounds (that can be healed). He has dealt with this raging lunatic for decades. He has been insulted, manipulated, and verbally abused by her. It usually comes as no surprise to him that his ex has turned his children against him. The man has usually remarried a supportive, and caring woman (opposite of his psychopathic ex-wife). He is able to move forward and accept the situation that his vindictive ex-wife has created. He is able to accept the loss, because he is emotionally mature enough to realize that there is NOTHING he can do to change anything.  The ex has lied and brainwashed the children for years. He is just too physically & emotionally exhausted. He has no fight left.   So he chooses to invest the little energy he has left on his current family. He usually can see that fighting with a borderline psychopath (his ex) is useless. She is evil, and she wants him to pay (as if he hasn't paid enough, when she cheated and lied to him for years). 

She is so delusional that after playing the victim for so long she actually believes she is the victim. Trait of a truly psychotic and dangerous woman.