Showing posts with label Co-parenting with a narcissist. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Co-parenting with a narcissist. Show all posts

Monday, July 8, 2019

When the narcissistic sociopath is a parent...

Toxic parents who abuse their partners and children are some of the darkest, and most evil people in our world. They are the most evolutionary caustic types  of human beings on the planet, if they can really even considered to be human at all...

Truly, as parental figures, such people with a known propensity for sociopathic traits and Malignant Narcissism should never be encouraged to breed.

Unfortunately though, they feel they must have children and a husband/wife in order to blend in with the world. They paint a picture to the world as the perfect all American family. When they are anything but that. But their goal is to appear as normal as possible to the world. They fear being exposed for the monster that they really are.

When sociopaths and narcissist decide to start a family and bring innocent children in the world, they do this for ALL the wrong reasons. Their intentions are not good. They only want the children as pawns to manipulate situations.

I am really referring to the female sociopath/narcissist.  Because having children makes people assume you are maternal and as a mother and caretaker of a small innocent child, the women is less likely to get exposed for the evil that she is. And she is also able to gain more sympathy from others with the children. Since she always will have a poor poor pitiful me story to tell everyone.

The female narcissist/sociopath is the most evil of evil, because she  gets away with abusing, manipulating and hurting for so long, because having children she is less likely to be suspected of being such an evil vindictive individual. 

She has a only evil reasons for wanting children so badly.

First off she needs these children to manipulate others with them. If she is married she manipulate her husband with them. If she is divorced, she uses the children to manipulate her ex husband, and control his life. She will attempt to get as much money as possible out of him for the children. Child support will not ever be enough for her. She will ask for money for this and that for the children. And the money never is spent on what the children. The ex husband will usually have to end up getting the children all the things that they need. Although the sociopathic mother said she needed money for it, she never uses any of the money on the children. She will control the ex husbands life with the children. This makes it hard to find love again. The female sociopath loves to waste the time of others. When it is the fathers time with his kids. She will hide them from him, sending him on a wild goose chase for hours until enough of his time is wasted then she will finally be available so that he can get them from her.
I witnessed a sociopathic mother do this to her ex husband for years. He was to pick them up at her home at 5 on Fridays. But when he arrived at 5, the children were not there. She would tell him they went with a friend to go look at kittens somewhere or play in the park, but to come back in an hour and they would be back. The father would come back in an hour. The children were still not home, and she always had an excuse, like they decided to get ice cream they will be back soon. So the father could wait in driveway awkwardly or go to grocery store and get some food and things for him and the kids for the weekend. When he would return around 7, no one would be at the sociopathic mother’s house. He would call her, and she would say that he took so long they decided to get something to eat. He would ask her if he could just pick them up at the restaurant they were at. She would say no. She would say come back at 9. So he has just wasted 4 hours trying to pick up his children. Finally when he would come back at 9. They would be home. And of course each kid (there were 2, a boy around 8 and and a girl around 12) they would have friends with them.

The sociopathic mother never told him about friends being with them, ask if that was ok. But at 9pm he was to good of a person to not allow the children’s friends to come with him. So she basically wasted his entire evening with his children and when he finally got them, they had friends over that he was going to have to care for as well.

He would also have to get the kids bags together. They stayed with him until Tuesday so he would have to get their backpacks for school and school clothes.

The sociopathic mother would intentionally take out certain items that she knew the kids would need for school or need in general, just to inconvenience her ex husband and waste more of his time. 

This is just one true example of how things were when this loving father would try to pick his children up on Friday. And how the female sociopath would make it so hard for him to do this.
This only what she did to him when he was trying to see and get his children. She did much worse than this. He never knew what she would do to make life hell for him next. But he was a smart man, so he was always expecting something.

She made everything miserable for him. Every birthday for the children was filled with her making it into drama. She would throw her own party for the kids (or actually her mother did all the work) And she also expected to be 100% in control of whatever the father had planned for the kids. And she expected him to pay for both.

It was hard for him to plan vacations to the beach with his children without her controlling every aspect of it. She would tell him last minute that the kids wanted to bring a friend with them to the beach. So his family beach vacation, turned into him having to watch his 2 children and his daughters 2 friend and the sons 1 friend. He didn’t say no, I will not do this because of the wrath that she would cause.

He basically lived life, trying to just have a minute of peace. Which he got very little.

She not only manipulated him with the children. She manipulated her mother with them as well. Mainly to get money out of the mother. Which she would say was because their POS dad refused to give to her. Even though he had given her the money, then she collected money from the mother, but never spent it on the kids. The father always had to end up getting whatever it was she claimed they needed.
As if the $3500 a month child support was not enough.
It was not enough. 
Nothing would ever be enough for this evil woman 

Why did This man never take this evil vindictive woman to court and fight for custody? Because the fax was she was never taken care of the children when they were at a young age because she did not want to take care of children that were younger and not self-sufficient. She was a very selfish woman. But she was an attorney and she knew the law very well. And she knew how to manipulate the system and as most of you know it is very hard to beat a  this man never take this evil vindictive woman to court and fight for custody? Because the fact was she was never taking care of the children when they were at a young age because she did not want to take care of children that were young and not self-sufficient. She was a very selfish woman. But she was an attorney and she knew the law very well. And she knew how to manipulate the system and as most of you know it is very hard to beat and sociopath or narcissist in court.
 They are able to turn everything around on you making you look like the horrible parent.  They will make up lies and they will end up making it so they have even more power over you. And still collect your money at the same time.

Watching a parent lie and manipulate others is absolutely brutal for children of narcissistic and sociopathic parents to have to endure. Not only does it cause them unregulated amounts
of Social, EMOTIONAL, and PHYSICAL PAIN to see a villain succeed, it 
shakes their faith.

Thursday, December 17, 2015

Obsession and Being a Victim of a Sociopath

Victims of sociopathic/narcissistic experience so many different painful emotions. These emotions do not stop just because the sociopath is now out of your life. In fact those painful emotions become even stronger at times. Especially during times of reflection and instrospection. The pain soon becomes anger. This anger is rightly justified. What the sociopath has done to us, is horrific.

The problem is with this anger, is that it becomes an obsession. We become obsessed with hatred of the sociopath/narcissist. Again, these feelings are certainly justified. But the problem with obsession is that it takes over our life. It interferes with our ability to regain control of our life, and move forward in a positive direction.

We were hurt and violated by a person who has no moral compass, unable to feel empathy, and is devoid of good and of a soul.  Usually hurt people, hurt people. We want to see the person who caused us such an enormous amount of pain and turmoil suffer some kind of consequences.
We even become somewhat obsessed with thinking about revenge, feeling ill will towards the person, thinking about what they did to us a majority of the time, and when doing so, we are re-living that nightmare all over again.

So you see, the problem with obsession is that is wear us out. It takes away precious moments of life that are waiting to be lived.
Do not feel ashamed if you have become obsessed in this way. It is normal. What is important is that you become aware of these feelings and thoughts, and you have the ability to change them.
We must cope with obsession by compartmentalizing it, only allowing ourself to dwell on it for specific periods of  time. This way you will be able to schedule your way out of it.

The sociopath/narcissist has stolen so much time from us, and we must accept that what happened, happened. Be thankful that now this evil individual is out of your life. Because now you are able to actually LIVE LIFE genuinely and joyfully.

Wednesday, August 5, 2015

Narcissist Thrive on Emotional Reactions




Narcissist thrive on evoking both reactions and emotions from their victims.

The narcissist wants you to respond to their unrealistic demands. They are aware of what they are doing, that's exactly why they do it. When the narcissist isn't treating you like garbage or like your existence is irrelevant, they will be doing or saying things to cause you pain. Most victims do not understand the person they are in love with lacks the ability to Love them back. They believe they are to blame. They do not understand why they are being rejected.  So they keep trying to please.  
The narcissist sees this as weakness and continues to allow their victim to be in pain, by rejecting them, cheating on them, and lying to them. 

It is hard to get through to the narcissists victim at this time. But eventually the victim will have enough. Unfortunately by the time the victim realizes this, they have been beaten down 
emotionally. They are depleted of energy and hope. It usually can take the victim years to 
get over their ordeal with the narcissist. And in all truth, the abuse they suffered cannot be forgotten. 

Don't lose hope if this is you. Once you have gotten the narcissist out of your life. Begin to LIVE again. Focus on healing your mind, body, and soul. 



Wednesday, March 11, 2015

Exposing a sociopath

It is difficult if not impossible to expose a sociopath for the lying, cheating, stealing, ruthless and soulless individual they really are. 
If you plan on exposing the sociopath it is important that you know what you are up against. They sociopath will not "go down" easily. You have to be the kind of person that can handle what the sociopath will do in retaliation to you. 
You MUST be strong, and confident and have a strong sense of self and high self esteem. Because the sociopath is going to try to rip you apart mentally. 
If you have been abused, and are still recovering from the abuse of a sociopathic individual then it is not advised that you try to expose them. You must focus on you, and your recovery. It is best that you just “cut them off” as best you can. Victims of sociopaths have been broken and are probably not equipped to seek revenge by exposing the sociopath. 
But if you have the strength, and you feel the need to expose a sociopath. Either to protect someone you love, a family member or someone that is in harms way. 
You must be able to really look at the person and see what they REALLY are. Which is a heartless, mean, evil, conscienceless, hateful, vindictive, and VENGEFUL. THEY HAVE NO QUALMS ABOUT DESTROYING YOU, YOUR FAMILY, or YOUR CHILDREN. 
The sociopaths only fear is really being exposed for who they really are. Because once they are exposed, it would make it difficult for them to continue to con, lie and get others to do what they want. 
You must know what you are up against and know what you are dealing with. 
If you choose to expose the sociopath this will put you at the mercy of the Sociopath. Nothing can or will obstruct the will of the sociopath. I cannot stress this to you enough. 
Only The real and the full you will be able defeat the Sociopath - and still that is sometimes not enough...
The sociopath is a person who HATES you (and everyone else), and a true Sociopath will do everything they can not to reveal what they are really thinking and what their true intentions are. He or she knows that they will be a “dead agent”* once she/he is seen for how who and what they really are. The sociopath is living  inside his head. 
One of the most important things you must understand about the sociopath is that the 'real' achilles heel of the Sociopath – is that they do not know how to have “normal responses” in their internal world, their entire life is made up of mimicking what they have seen others do and how others acted toward a situation that required an emotional response. Therefore they do not actually know what a sane, correct response IS.
This means that unless they are TOLD what to say that would get you to think they have the right response, or unless they see it done somewhere:
THEY DO NOT HAVE THE EMOTIONAL CAPABILITIES TO ORIGINATE THE RIGHT MORAL RESPONSE. 

Friday, August 29, 2014

Malicious Co Parenting

If you are lucky you will never encounter a sociopath or psychopath in your life time. For us who have had to deal with the malicious sociopath it will likely be the worst experience in your life. They come in both genders, though most are male. They are emotional vampires, sucking the life (emotional and financial resources) out of you. Until you have nothing. Then they move on to their next victim.



Marrying a sociopath is a horrible life changing experience. Having children with a sociopath is a horrific nightmare that will never end!
Anyone who has to deal with these types of wicked, evil and inhumane beings, knows the damage they are capable of.  Trying to break free from them, will leave you wounded for years and even a lifetime. That is just how poisonous and toxic they are to you.  They will NEVER leave you alone. 

Do Not think that "DIVORCE" means you are free of the sociopath. If there are children to use against you, they will use those children, even if it means emotionally f*cking them up for life. THE SOCIOPATH DOES NOT CARE. If they think you are suffering, then they don't mind hurting their own innocent children to ensure that. The sociopath will continue to make UNREASONABLE AND RIDICULOUS DEMANDS on you. They will refuse to allow you to have any peace in your life. One of the most absurd experiences I have experienced with my sociopath, is after being divorced for 8 years and separated for 4. The sociopath demands that we spend Thanksgiving, Christmas, Easter, and birthday together. Even though both of us have remarried. And the reason for this (so the sociopath says) is because it's important for the children to see their parents getting along.. Ha ha... That's laughable! It HAS NOTHING TO DO WITH WANTING  the children to see their parents having a healthy relationship and getting along... It's all about control. They want to control you. They want to control your holidays. They want to make sure that you are not happy and enjoying Christmas with your new spouse. My sociopath has requested every year that I come over Christmas morning and put the kids toys together. I am thinking in my mind when I get these ridiculous request; SURE! I would love to wake up, drive 20 minutes to your home and put the children's toys together, while you are passed out in the other room and I have to chit chat with you new spouse... That's not awkward or weird, ya freak.. My children are now older (teenagers) and there is not any toys to put together this coming Christmas. I'm pretty my sociopath will still FIND a reason to harass me or my spouse and try to guilt us into why we should spend out Christmas with them. YOU REALLY WOULD THINK AFTER 8 YEARS OF DECLINING THE INVITATION AND 2 years of having NO CONTACT with the psychopath, they would eventually back off and take a "HINT" by now. But Nope.. 
The point is they want complete power, and control over their victims or targets. They will do anything to keep that power they once had. You have to refuse to engage. Refuse to react to them. And pray that they will leave you alone one day. It's been almost a decade and mine has yet to get the hint that I will never be manipulated again. I have tried to co parenting. When the other parent has evil and malicious intentions, every attempt to co parent will end up in disaster. You have to figure out how you can see your children without going through the sociopathic parent.