Sunday, March 26, 2017

The sociopath only wants to WIN


If you are a woman and are dealing with a sociopath ex. If you are lucky, your ex will find a new lover and become uninterested in seeing his children. Sociopath/narcissistic men usually are selfish and children are more of an inconvenience to them.
When a sociopathic male tries to seek custody of children , they do so because they want to either
1. Hurt the other parent.
2. If they make good money and are going to have to pay a large amount of child support.
If the sociopathic male is wealthy and has plenty of money to take you to court and fight for custody of the children - HE WILL DO SO. And of course if he is able to discredit the mother with lies and slander, and gets somewhat custody of the children, you can bet that he will not be the one who is taking care of the kids. He will have a relative take care of them or find a women who will take care of them.
He only wanted to take the children from the mother in order TO WIN.

That is what it is all about. WINNING. Male or Female. The sociopath wants to win. They want to turn you into dust. They will usually boast about how they have custody or how they are the "domiciliary" parent. They portray themselves as Mom or Dad of the year. Always talking about how they do this and that for their kids, and letting everyone know what a piece of shit the other parent is.

When dealing with a sociopath, in my experience NO CONTACT is the only option. Of course if you share children with the sociopath this becomes a bit more complicated. 

If you are a man, and you ex is a sociopath, this situation is difficult and frustrating. 
When children are younger, in order to see the children, communication will have to be made. Every interaction with the sociopath is going to be chaotic, frustrating, and stressful. 
But I can tell you that it does not have to last like this forever. 
There  is a light at the end of what seems like a very long, hopeless tunnel. 
Your children will get older. And soon you will be able to communicate directly with them. The sociopath will not like this at all. They will tell  you that you are an irresponsible parent for "using" the children to communicate with. They will give you lectures on how you should coparent with them. They will make desperate attempts to speak with you. They will use the kids to try to talk with you. They will make up lies about the children.  
Example: they will tell you that a child is having problems in school due to your lack of co-parenting, or that the child is going thru hormonal changes and they want you to talk with them about boys/girls, birds and bees, etc... Blah blah blah blah....

A close friend of mine dealt with a sociopathic ex for years, but started communicating with kids by cell phone he purchased for kids. The ex was losing control, but couldn't take kids phone because all other kids that age had phones, and she didn't want to look like the bad guy by taking it. But she was angry that she was unable to speak to him and manipulate and waste his time by using the kids. He was able to make plans to get the kids on his weekends, without having to go through the crap that came with dealing with the ex. She loved to waste his time by taking the children else where when he was suppose to pick up. 
 But if your child is able to communicate with you via cell phone/text, you will be able to confirm with them if what the other parent is telling you is true or false . 
Remember they only want direct communication with you, because without it they cannot manipulate you and use the children to waste your time and drain your energy and wallet. 

Thursday, October 20, 2016

Finding our beautiful soul behind painful lessons

The best things those of us who have been terrorized by a sociopath is to lead the best possible life that we can. Everyones healing process will be different. But the truth is once the sociopath is out of your life, you have the chance to be free and discover who you truly are meant to be, before the sociopath came into your life and destroyed many beautiful parts of you.

When the healing starts to take place we will discover how many amazing gifts we have. We are able to choose those who deserve to be our company.

The sociopath manipulated us for so long we became lost and forgot our dreams and goals. Remembering these things will help you to heal and  calm your mind. This will be essential for us to begin healing and moving  forward in our life..
Do what you love everyday. Once you are free of the sociopath, you will find you now finally have the time to live your life. You may have to overcome certain fears and anxiety first, but this should be easy for you. You have survived a sociopath, and if you can do that, you can do ANYTHING!

The sociopath causes one to feel empty. Some of us have forgotten how to smile at others, make simple eye contact, or even just be silly and have fun. You are capable of all of these things. The real you is still there, some of us  just must go deep to find it.

Never forget that you have survived! Having a sociopath in your life means that you have been through a situation that was degrading, demeaning and horrible. Some of us even lived in the same home with the sociopath which was a house of terror, contemptuous and destructive treatment.
But we are still here today. We are not victims anymore. We are survivors. We endured every moment and every day with a monster who came across normal to the rest of the world. We felt fear of their arriving home, we felt anxiety of what emotional abuse was to come next, every single minute of the day that we were with the sociopath. We lived in fear and terror. The fact that we are still here and working to let go of that painful part of the past.  That deserves the deepest of respect.

We will heal from All the pain the sociopath has caused us. Unlike the sociopath we are capable of learning valuable life lessons from our painful life choices and mistakes. It is in these painful lessons, we become stronger, wiser, and better. It is in those painful lessons we learn that NO ONE owns us. We own ourself...

Once we have accepted that we were at the mercy of a very evil individual for months or years. All because we are kind, giving, loving, forgiving and genuine. And that is why the sociopath chose us. They do not choose people who are harsh, mean, aggressive and overly assertive, that would make manipulating, lying, cheating and controlling to hard for them. They don't much care for a challenge. In fact most of them are very lazy and would rather be able control and abuse without having to put a lot of effort towards it. They are looking for someone they believe will take being abused and keep their mouth shut about the abuse. Once the relationship had ended, the sociopath will always cover his/her tracks by slaughtering your character and making up lie after lie about you. This is one of the abusive acts that the sociopath will put extreme efforts towards. Just to be sure that if you do decide to speak about what was done to you, they have made sure no one will believe you.

Understand this is what these types of individuals do! Before you, they were doing it to someone else.  After you, they will find another victim and do the same to that person. You were not the first target/victim, and you will not be the last.

We will eventually find our way to the path of freedom. And will be set free from the emotional prison that the sociopath held us in. We will finally be rid of this evil creature once and for all.

Healing will start to take place. Although it does not occur over night. It is a process that takes time. But in this process you will learn more about yourself than you ever knew existed.
You will find out what an amazing person you are and that you have always been. 

A sociopath is a thief, they take so much from everyone. They take away confidence, peace of mind and faith in humanity. They steal the light that they see in the victim, and replace it with dark.
No matter how broken you think you are. All that the sociopath takes away from you can be restored.

The one thing that the sociopath can NEVER take from you, is your soul.

It is something that they do not not have and that they lack. They hate you and everyone else who has soul. No matter what terrible, evil, awful, hateful, deceptive, degrading, demeaning, immoral, horrific painful and abusive acts they have committed towards you.

You will always have a beautiful soul. 

And that is something that the sociopath will NEVER be able to experience, or be able to steal from you or anyone else. They will remain empty, shallow, miserable and unable to ever experience the beauty of love and compassion.









Finding our beautiful soul behind painful lessons

The best things those of us who have been terrorized by a sociopath is to lead the best possible life that we can. Everyones healing process will be different. But the truth is once the sociopath is out of your life, you have the chance to be free and discover who you truly are meant to be, before the sociopath came into your life and destroyed many beautiful parts of you.

When the healing starts to take place we will discover how many amazing gifts we have. We are able to choose those who deserve to be our company.

The sociopath manipulated us for so long we became lost and forgot our dreams and goals. Remembering these things will help you to heal and  calm your mind. This will be essential for us to begin healing and moving  forward in our life..
Do what you love everyday. Once you are free of the sociopath, you will find you now finally have the time to live your life. You may have to overcome certain fears and anxiety first, but this should be easy for you. You have survived a sociopath, and if you can do that, you can do ANYTHING!

The sociopath causes one to feel empty. Some of us have forgotten how to smile at others, make simple eye contact, or even just be silly and have fun. You are capable of all of these things. The real you is still there, some of us  just must go deep to find it.

Never forget that you have survived! Having a sociopath in your life means that you have been through a situation that was degrading, demeaning and horrible. Some of us even lived in the same home with the sociopath which was a house of terror, contemptuous and destructive treatment.
But we are still here today. We are not victims anymore. We are survivors. We endured every moment and every day with a monster who came across normal to the rest of the world. We felt fear of their arriving home, we felt anxiety of what emotional abuse was to come next, every single minute of the day that we were with the sociopath. We lived in fear and terror. The fact that we are still here and working to let go of that painful part of the past.  That deserves the deepest of respect.

We will heal from All the pain the sociopath has caused us. Unlike the sociopath we are capable of learning valuable life lessons from our painful life choices and mistakes. It is in these painful lessons, we become stronger, wiser, and better. It is in those painful lessons we learn that NO ONE owns us. We own ourself...

Once we have accepted that we were at the mercy of a very evil individual for months or years. All because we are kind, giving, loving, forgiving and genuine. And that is why the sociopath chose us. They do not choose people who are harsh, mean, aggressive and overly assertive, that would make manipulating, lying, cheating and controlling to hard for them. They don't much care for a challenge. In fact most of them are very lazy and would rather be able control and abuse without having to put a lot of effort towards it. They are looking for someone they believe will take being abused and keep their mouth shut about the abuse. Once the relationship had ended, the sociopath will always cover his/her tracks by slaughtering your character and making up lie after lie about you. This is one of the abusive acts that the sociopath will put extreme efforts towards. Just to be sure that if you do decide to speak about what was done to you, they have made sure no one will believe you.

Understand this is what these types of individuals do! Before you, they were doing it to someone else.  After you, they will find another victim and do the same to that person. You were not the first target/victim, and you will not be the last.

We will eventually find our way to the path of freedom. And will be set free from the emotional prison that the sociopath held us in. We will finally be rid of this evil creature once and for all.

Healing will start to take place. Although it does not occur over night. It is a process that takes time. But in this process you will learn more about yourself than you ever knew existed.
You will find out what an amazing person you are and that you have always been. 

A sociopath is a thief, they take so much from everyone. They take away confidence, peace of mind and faith in humanity. They steal the light that they see in the victim, and replace it with dark.
No matter how broken you think you are. All that the sociopath takes away from you can be restored.

The one thing that the sociopath can NEVER take from you, is your soul.

It is something that they do not not have and that they lack. They hate you and everyone else who has soul. No matter what terrible, evil, awful, hateful, deceptive, degrading, demeaning, immoral, horrific painful and abusive acts they have committed towards you.

You will always have a beautiful soul. 

And that is something that the sociopath will NEVER be able to experience, or be able to steal from you or anyone else. They will remain empty, shallow, miserable and unable to ever experience the beauty of love and compassion. Which is the emotions that the majority of human beings possess that makes us different from wild animals









Saturday, October 8, 2016

How the sociopath will silence the victim

Truly evil people avoid extending themselves. They will take any action in their power to protect their own laziness, to preserve the integrity of their sick self. 

Rather than nurturing others,they will actually destroy others in this cause. If necessary, they will even kill to escape the pain of their own spiritual growth.



                                 —M. Scott Peck, Psychiatrist, 

                                Author People of the Lie


Narcissists, Sociopaths, and psychopaths are not mentally ill. There is no therapy to that will ever be able to help them. There is no amount of medication for them to take to balance their brain chemicals. 
It is not their brain chemistry that is off balance. 
It is their soul and conscience. The simple fact is, these types of people have no soul, no conscience, they feel no guilt, no remorse. They find ways to fly under the radar, doing just enough to convince others they are productive. But those who are unfortunate enough to live with a person like this, know the truth. Most are usually to afraid of callling the sociopath out on their lies and deceptive behaviors. This is because they know the damage the sociopath is capable of doing to them. 

The sociopath will stop at nothing to silence someone who they believe could expose them for who they really are. They will do this by spreading lies about the person who they deem as a threat before the person can expose them. The sociopath will begin making accusations toward the target. Staying that the person is crazy, unstable, and a liar. Sociopaths play the victim while vilifying the real victim. They will say they are afraid of what this person will do to them, accuse the person of being obsessed and stalking them. 

Social media makes this very easy for them to do these things. After the sociopath has created enough doubt in the minds of others and spread enough destroying information about the person. The victim is usually silenced, because they are traumatized by what is being said about them. The disgusting lies that the sociopath has said, damages the self esteem of the victim. The person no longer has the confidence to tell their story and what the sociopath has done to them. 
Even when the sociopath has silenced their victim, .this doesn't mean that they will stop mentally and emotionally tormenting the victim. 




Friday, June 17, 2016

The Reign of Terror Never Really Ends

Sociopaths really do not understand honesty, they believe it is something that only the weak and vulnerable does. Their mind is so warped and twisted, they truly cannot comprehend truth, love and compassion.


Being exposed for the shallow, manipulative, soulless liar is something that terrifies the sociopath/narcissist. 

The sociopath/narcissist has a few primary goals, that do not change much through out ones entire existence. That goal is to control others by any means possible.
Having control ensures the sociopath can live an easy, carefree life, never having any real responsibility. 

The sociopath wants the outer world to perceive him/her as a do-gooder. 
Someone who is empathic, and hard working.  Something all of us who have ever had to deal with this type for dysfunctional person know all to well.

All of us that have dealt with a character flawed individual (sociopath/narcissist) already know that they believe they are too "special" and "precious" to actually work hard for something. This is the reason they seek out people whom they believe to be “weak”. They target these types of people because they are compassionate, generous and loving. 
The sociopath knows that they will be able to fully take advantage of their kindness. 
They don't see people as potential friends or future lovers. They see them as an object they can use to do all the work that they believe they themselves are to good to do. 

The sociopath/narcissist will take the credit, and recognition for the hard work and responsibility that is done by someone else. 


People who are unaware that they are in a relationship with a sociopath do not realize it until their life has been turned upside down by one. 

There is never enough anyone can give the sociopath to satisfy them. 
Many have tried to give and give to the sociopath, only to exhaust themselves, and realize they are attempting to fill a black hole of nothingness. 
The sociopath is so shallow, there is nothing  in this world that will ever fill the emptiness that they are. 

YOU WILL NEVER BE ABLE TO PLEASE A SOCIOPATH! 
Everything is very temporary for them. They leave their victims feeling alone, defeated, and broken. 

The sociopath is envious of others. Not because of anything other than they want to be the center of attention at all times. 

I have personal experience with a female sociopath who has aged awfully.
I'm sure this person has always been hateful by nature. As she has aged, not so gracefully she has becomes even more hateful, bitter and resentful. 

I always wondered if the sociopath ever changes with age.. For most of us when we age we do not have the energy we did when we were younger. But I have experienced with a certain sociopath who I have to still somewhat deal with, that aging does not stop their  reign of terror. 









Tuesday, January 12, 2016

Marrying a psychopath, and how they portray you as the unstable perpetrator.


Sociopath, narcissist, psychopath... Whatever you want to call one. They have one similar quality..

They have NO remorse. 

They are capable of causing horrific pain and suffering. (mentally and physically)  They simply could care less about the damage they cause. When normal people cause pain others pain, it is usually under the circumstance of being hurt, afraid or simply not having the tools to handle confrontation and pain appropriately. The difference in normal and psychopathic is; Normal individuals feel remorse for what they have done to hurt a person. The guilt will affect them so much, they have a hard time living a happy life. Psychopaths are able to keep thriving, the pain they know they have caused someone, doesn't bother them. They probably won't ever think about it again, unless the person they caused the pain to, expresses that they are hurt. This doesn't evoke guilt in the psychopath. Instead it evokes ANGER, irritation, and then the psychopath continues to cause more hurt, and damage.
Psychopaths intentionally hurt others, without ever feeling any guilt. 

In fact, “guilt” is a foreign emotion to the psychopath. They do not know what guilt feels like because they have never felt it. Yet ‘guilt’ is used often by the psychopath to manipulate others
They are often able to get people to do what they want, by making the person feel guilty. 

From my own observations, guilt is one of the psychopaths favorite tools to use against an empathic, caring person. Especially when it comes to children. Having children with a person with psychopathic tendencies is a living hell. It is almost impossible to ever live a happy life when you share children with a psychopath. They will never leave you alone, they will use the children to manipulate and use you.  The psychopath pretends to be a caring parent who Loves their children, but the truth is, the psychopath is not capable of Love. They are only capable of Hate. And unfortunately the psychopath HATES their EX more than they LOVE their children. 
Even when the children are of adult age, the psychopath will still find a reason to torment you. 

People who marry psychopaths, do not marry them knowing they are psychopathic. They were lied to and manipulated to believe the person was genuine and caring. But the person soon learns that person they married is not a good person. Some people will live in deniall, because accepting that you have married a monster is a hard pill to swallow. The marriage never last, but the abuse and trauma from the marriage does.. 
The psychopath becomes bored with their spouse/victim, because they have nothing more to offer the psychopath. So the psychopath simply moves on to their next victim, of course not before slandering, spreading lies, and accusing the victim of horrific acts against them. They do this to protect themselves against what the victim may say about the relationship. By bashing the victim first (before the relationship is even over) the psychopath is making sure their 'story' is heard before the victims. 
This makes the victims story look false. 

After all the psychopath has already warned others that their soon to be ex, would probably try to accuse them of abuse or cheating, to simply get revenge because they didn't want to be in a relationship with such a unstable person who has deep mental problems. 






The sociopathic grin - Smiling or Baring Teeth


This quote is talking about a sociopath.
And it is so true! 

Sociopaths smile so nicely to everyone, and look so friendly. Little do most know that they are actually planning on destroying someone.
The person they will always target is the caring, sympathic, loving and most genuine person. 

After all why  would a sociopath target someone like themselves? With someone with the same intentions that they have? When it's much easier for them to target a kind, trusting and giving individual. 
Sociopaths and narcissists have an unhealthy deep love for themselves and their own reflection in the mirror. 
Of course you will only see the hatred they have for you after the honeymoon phase is over of course.