The OBSESSED Narcissist

The narcissist has a difficult time knowing what is real, and what is a delusional that they made up in their crazy minds..

As a DSM-IV trait, the narcissisit's need to fend off inner emptiness, feel special and in control, and avoid feeling defective. The narcissist can become so delusional that they are bordering on a fine line between their own delusions and what is actually real.  

As unhealthy this is for the narcissist, it is even more unhealthy for people in he narcissist life. And it usually will turn into to gaslighting for the narcissistic individuals family members. It causes them confusion, frustration, and delusional thinking...

A person trying to end a relationship or cut ties with a narcissist has a difficult doing so, because the narcissist becomes the person you always wanted them to be. Nice..but it is all an act... To get you to take them back so they can control and treat you like crap again. 

The narcissistic person becomes obsessed with their partner when the partner is not responding, and trying to have no contact. They are obsessed with getting the  CONTROL, they once had back. They can't stand the fact that someone has actually rejected them. Especially their partner, who they have viewed as weak and pathetic. They will not like the fact that you have made a good and healthy decision for yourself - which was to no longer be a part of their dysfunction! 

When the relationship is over, the narcissist can actually do become dangerously obsessed with their ex-partner.  

After failed attempts to get their ex back, the disordered narcissist will resort to stalking, destroying property, verbal attacks, ridiculous demands, and obsessive calling, emailing and obsessively text messaging. 

People with Narcissistic Personality Disorder confuse the intensity they feel with intimacy. They do not know how to have healthy, loving, and intimate relationships. 

Being in a narcissistic relationship is painful. Narcissist cheat, lie and treat their partners as if they mean nothing to them.  The relationship is built around infidelity, the narcissist huge EGO and control. 

(The narcissist can also be jealous and fear losing control but it has more to do with maintaining their narcissistic supply source)

The fact is, that there are some people who are just unable to mentally “let go” of their partner after a break up — especially if there were children as a result from the relationship.

It is difficult to end a relationship with narcissist. The narcissist will keep calling, keep visiting, keep arguing and trying to reconcile. All while still having sex with other people. THE NARCISSIST NEVER CHANGES, THEY WILL ONLY PRETEND TO BE WHAT YOU WANT UNTIL THEY GET THAT CONTROL BACK.

The non-disordered person may take the narcissist back a few times before they realize that nothing will ever become better. 

Once you end the relationship for GOOD with the narcissist, you may be followed, stalked, threatened, put downed, and called nasty names by your ex. 

When left unaddressed, in extreme cases the disordered Narcissist becomes obsessed  and it may progress to the point that they will use the children to get their ex to respond, and if those tactics don't work they may threaten to hurt the children. 

Narcissist manipulate their ex by using the children. But when that DOES NOT work. The narcissist becomes desperate and angry - they are willing to do whatever they must to make contact with their ex.  

The narcissist knows their ex loves the children, then the disordered person will attempt to hurt their ex by hurting the children. 

In extreme cases they will actually cause harm to their children. Even kidnapping the child (children) from school or by refusing to return the child after their visitation is up. 

Narcissist and Sociopaths have very many similiar traits. The sociopath is usually more ruthless in their tactics to gain control or get what they want.

Covert Abuse and Emotional Manipulation

       

A sociopath wants to gain control over you. They will use deceptive and underhanded ways to change your thinking. Their victim doesn't realize that this is even happening, until it is too late. 

They sociopath says subtle things that are meant to erode your esteem and emotional well being. They will chip at you and your self worth until there is very little of it left. 

A sociopath sees themselves as superior and sees others as nothing now than an object to be used. Sociopaths have No Empathy, no guilt, no remorse, and no conscience. They use you for their entertainment purposes only. 

They become bored with you and start to hate you eventually, even when you have done nothing but try to please them. Their behavior is cruel, horrific, and can psychologically, mentally, and physically destroy you. 

A sociopath can spot your weakness, your strengths and your fears easily. They will use all of these against you to gain control over you. They will stop at nothing to get what they want out of you, even if it means hurting you. 

Next thing you realize is that your once loving relationship has turned into a demeaning, degrading relationship. Leaving you confused and diminishing your self respect, self worth, and self esteem. The sociopath wants you to feel like you are losing your mind. Their intention is to make you question reality. The victim finds him/herself blaming themself for the sociopath not loving them like they use to. The victim believes it is their fault their once loving relationship has turned cold. The sociopath wants you to feel this way. They relish in the fact that they have brought you down to a rock bottom level. The sociopath is evil. 

It's hard to imagine anyone treating someone like this ON PURPOSE. But that is exactly what the sociopath does. The sociopath wants to turn you into a crying and begging emotional wreck. The victim struggles with feelings of powerlessness, and deep knife stabbing pain. The victim loses all sense of their self worth, they sometimes may turn to drugs or alcohol. The victim is so damaged that they become depressed, and withdrawn. They start to isolate and lose the support of others they use to have. 

If you are the target of a malicious and vindictive sociopath, you must remember IT IS NOT YOUR FAULT! The sociopaths plan from the beginning was to harm you emotionally. They enjoy seeing others beg and plead, and then they feel accomplished in the fact that they can deny the victim and walk away. 

This is emotional rape. A covert emotional manipulator methodically wears down their victim. At it's worse, victims lose all sense of self and their personal values. 

Sociopaths do not look like monsters. Most of them are someone that looks just like Suzie soccer mom, or dan the loving father who attends all his kids PTA meetings. These sociopaths are so dangerous because they blend end so well, that the only people who suffer are the sociopaths children and partner and other family members. They fly under the radar, committing small crimes like fraud, identity theft, slander and defamation, and if they are in a business where money can be laundered and stolen – you can bet the sociopath is doing these things. They are 100% stealing from their partner and family. They will take out credit cards and loans in their victims name. When caught they use excuses and other manipulations, such as gas- lighting. Saying to the victim “you knew I got this card, you knew about this loan, we talked about it, remember?”

The victim is then left confused and questioning their own sanity. 

Sociopaths have contempt for their victims. They have no remorse about any of the deceptive things they do to their partner. They cheat with other people, they lie, steal, and destroy their victim one piece at a time. 

When confronted for any of these behaviors the sociopath blames and will spin the story, to make you look crazy. 

Why does the sociopath do this to someone who loves them, and has continued to make efforts to save the marriage, to fix things, and to please them? It's because they have no love inside them. They have no good in them. They have an evil mentality that aims to destroy anyone or anything that they cross paths with. 

Sociopaths feels a sense of entitlement. They are not capable of having  a meaningful and honest relationship with anyone...

They will never be able to form healthy attachments to another person. Being that they are incaple of loving anyone or receiving love from anyone. Even if their victim loves them, they are unable to feel it. All they feel is hate and anger toward the person who tries to love them.

At their core, the sociopath is filled with rage, and mental issues. The sociopath  will attempt to project their own mental instability onto their partner or the person who confronts them. 

When you are in a relationship with a sociopath, you will come to realize that they are unreliable and irresponsible. Yet, the sociopath becomes enraged and vengeful if they believe you have not followed through on something you said you will do. Even if you were unable to do something due to illness or a death in your family. The sociopath doesn't care. They will never be there for you emotionally. They see you as emotionally weak, and usually when you are feeling more vulnerable and weak, the sociopath sees it as am opportunity to kick you while you are down.

This is a very abusive and vicious cycle that the sociopath always puts you in. Rarely sociopaths abuse you physically. It is all about controlling and abusing you psychologically and emotionally. But that is not to say that the sociopath will NOT become physically violent with you. They are capable of physical abuse. More so in men than women.. 

What is so "crazy making" about the sociopath is that they actually expect you  to show them gratitude for any menial task they have done. Even after neglecting you for months and emotionally abusing you. If they do the smallest thing, they expect you to kiss their feet and adore them for that. 

When you know something in your relationship is just not quite “right”. And you suspect that your partner is a sociopath. The best thing you can do for yourself, your family, and your children, is to get out of that abusive situation. No matter what. If you are married and share children with the sociopath, you can expect life long drama and conflict. They will resent you for leaving them! How dare you! And even after moving on, and remarrying, they will always use your children to torment you. 

Unless you have experienced this kind of abuse, it's hard to understand the damage that is has taken on the victim. If the victim finally realizes that their quality of life has been suffering and that they have been living in fear and misery and decides to leave the sociopath. They realize the harm that the sociopath will cause them. They have to see that leaving the sociopath is more beneficial than staying with them to endure abuse the rest of their life. 

Sociopaths and narcissist

When you're not accustomed to dealing with distorted personalities like the narcissist and the sociopath, you will be totally caught off guard - especially when you are a genuinely good person. It's hard to realize that their are people among us with NO conscience and No Guilt or remorse.. 

Narcissist and sociopaths create fear in good people. You see these people committ other atrocities (and get away with it). Why wouldn't the atrocities they are doing to you be any different. 

Your fear of the narcissist and sociopath is valid. It is not just a misplaced feeling. Your fear is a warning and it is entirely justified. 

The best thing you can do for you and your loved ones is to get away from the distorted person -NO MATTER WHAT. If that means moving - DO IT. 

Sociopaths and Narcissist are extremely dangerous.