Saturday, March 29, 2014
The Aging Narcassist
The narcissist ages without compassion or grace; she is shallow and does not accept her aging well... Her body is withered with age, plastic surgeon can't tuck or nip enough to make her look like a woman again. Her deceptive overworked mind betrayed her at the same time her body has. She stares in disbelief and rage at mirrors which show her who she really is. The female narcissist ages prematurely and finds herself in a time warp. Where she is in a constant struggle with becoming old and drifting into a midlife crisis. When she was a child prodigy, a sex symbol, a successful prosecutor, or an outstanding intellectual-the narcissist was at the center of attention. She had everyone eating out of her hand — so she believed... Now she has become disillusioned in her old age as her old charms have worn thin. Her charisma is gone. She can no longer manipulate with big pretty eyes. Her eyes look worn and her skin is leathery..
Growing old requires grace and courage. Aging is a series of physical and mental insults that you have to take in stride or you become an unpleasant burden to yourself and those around you. Grace and courage are not traits the narcissist possesses at any age - ever. So the lack of these virtues becomes all the more apparent as she grows old. Old age points out and highlights what you’ve been all your life. The narcissist is hideous on the inside and out. Midlife proves that
Having been exposed for what she is-a deceitful, treacherous, spiteful egotist-the narcissist’s old tricks now fails her. People are on their guard and less gullible than before. The narcissist, with her rigid personality, can’t change. She reverts to old habits, old behaviors that use to get her what she wanted, only to fail. No one believes her lies, no one respects her, no one cares about her anymore. She has alienated any family, children or “friends” she ever had. She surrenders to former temptations. She is made a mockery by her stubborn denial of the reality of aging, by her stubborn refusal to grow up, an eternal (brat) child in the sagging body of an old woman.
The narcissist is singularly maladapted to life’s trials and tribulations. Time tends to make brilliant people lose their magic, lovers exhaust their potency, and philanderers wear out their appeal. After the age of 40 the narcissist becomes more average and boring and less appealing. The wider the gap between her pretensions and her actual accomplishments, the more she is the object of derision and contempt by others who have learned to see through her facade. And after 40 years in the same small town or community, everyone sees who she really is. Everyone knows what deception she has done and lies she has told. She is alone. Because she has screwed over everyone. She is hated.
She will try to convince herself she is adored. But she knows that people avoid her. They refuse to talk to her. They hate her. She can see it when she looks at them.
Few narcissists bother to maintain a business, keep their jobs, raise functioning families or nurture their friendships. Narcissist end up bitterly alone having squandered the love of spouse, offspring and friends. The contrast between the prime of her youth and her now look of ruin presents a constitute of permanent narcissistic injury. The narcissist retreats deeper into herself to find comfort and consolation, withdrawing deeper into her grandiose fantasies and delusions. They are deprived of any qualities that would make them content at this time of their lives. The decrepitude of their character is reflected in the decrepitude of their aging and sagging bodies.
For the aging female narcissists, it is too late. They initiated the demise of business partners, spouses, and former friends– who are now enemies. The narcissist has burned so many human bridges. She has betrayed, abused, demeaned, and humiliated countless human beings. Some narcissists have even destroyed their own children as a result of repetitive abandonments, degrading criticisms and malicious agendas.
The female narcissist dies alone. She has no one to count on or to check on her. She is a horrible human being til the day she dies.