Thursday, December 17, 2015

Obsession and Being a Victim of a Sociopath

Victims of sociopathic/narcissistic experience so many different painful emotions. These emotions do not stop just because the sociopath is now out of your life. In fact those painful emotions become even stronger at times. Especially during times of reflection and instrospection. The pain soon becomes anger. This anger is rightly justified. What the sociopath has done to us, is horrific.

The problem is with this anger, is that it becomes an obsession. We become obsessed with hatred of the sociopath/narcissist. Again, these feelings are certainly justified. But the problem with obsession is that it takes over our life. It interferes with our ability to regain control of our life, and move forward in a positive direction.

We were hurt and violated by a person who has no moral compass, unable to feel empathy, and is devoid of good and of a soul.  Usually hurt people, hurt people. We want to see the person who caused us such an enormous amount of pain and turmoil suffer some kind of consequences.
We even become somewhat obsessed with thinking about revenge, feeling ill will towards the person, thinking about what they did to us a majority of the time, and when doing so, we are re-living that nightmare all over again.

So you see, the problem with obsession is that is wear us out. It takes away precious moments of life that are waiting to be lived.
Do not feel ashamed if you have become obsessed in this way. It is normal. What is important is that you become aware of these feelings and thoughts, and you have the ability to change them.
We must cope with obsession by compartmentalizing it, only allowing ourself to dwell on it for specific periods of  time. This way you will be able to schedule your way out of it.

The sociopath/narcissist has stolen so much time from us, and we must accept that what happened, happened. Be thankful that now this evil individual is out of your life. Because now you are able to actually LIVE LIFE genuinely and joyfully.

Sunday, November 8, 2015

The long journey of healing after a psychopath

Healing after being in a relationship with a psychopathic person is a long hard journey. I have personally seen how a psychopath can turn a once vibrant, positive, assertive person into a passive, insecure and scared person. 
It never really ends with a psychopath.  

Sometimes a victim of a psychopath will go for years without hearing from the psychopath. Then one day, out of the blue the psychopath will call. This is usually because they have become tired of their last victim, and decide to contact someone that they believe they can trick again..

Psychopaths have no decency in them.  

Psychopaths and Sociopaths have a negative energy that surrounds them. 
Most of us are unaware of this negativity around them until it is too late. Once we do begin to realize that the psychopath is not who and what they say they say, the psychopath begins a campaign to destroy their victim before the victim can speak out about them, and expose who they really are.  Even after the relationship is over, the psychopath will continue tΠΎ slander their victim by relentlessly attacking their reputation and character.  The psychopath IS NOT looking to just hurt their victim, the psychopath is on a mission to DESTROY and ANNIHILATE their victim,
 A psychopath will even attack their victims family (children included) and lie about people the victim loves, just to get the emotional reaction from their victim. This can go on for years, even after you have made no contact, moved away, and refused to react, or retaliate. 

So why does the psychopath continue to harass, gossip about, and torment their victim even after their victim has moved on, and has no contact with the psychopath? One would think the psychopath would simply move on to their next victim. After all you have avoided the psychopath, and do not pose an immediate threat to them. The truth is,  the psychopath continues to wreak havoc on a victims life because they simply can. And usually it is out of  BOREDOM....  Yes, the psychopath remembers how they could get an emotional reaction out of their victim (you). They have exhausted and broken all of their other victims.  So they look for someone familiar, someone who they think will “entertain” them temporarily. 
To the psychopath, you are an object. Your pain is nothing to them,. Example - destroying a persons life is no less or greater to them than popping a balloon.  If the psychopath can get a response, they will start their attack on you full force. 

This is why it is important to your well being that once a relationship has ended with one, that you never look at their social media page, and you have no contact ever again. If you have to change your life, and do thinks such as change your email, your cell phone, DO IT. And keep your distance no matter what. Usually you don't have to worry about running into the Sociopath in town, since the sociopath rarely attends social functions, due to their inner dysfunctional. The Psychopath is a little more function usually. The sociopath is not so functional. They can't handle any lack of stimulation, so they usually turn to drugs or alcohol to surpass the time. 

Sunday, October 25, 2015

When Reality Slaps You Hard

The realization that you are dealing with a sociopath. Or have been romantically involved or currently still are involved with a sociopath, narcissist or a psychopath is a very surreal and scary feeling. You have obviously realized something was not “right” with the person. So you did meticulous research and all signs point to a person who lacks a conscience.
A person who has no regard for the feelings of any other person but him/herself..

It is very difficult for most of us to understand and accept that there are people in our world that do not feel any empathy and have absolutely NO remorse. 
What is even more devastating (besides finding out the person you have shared so many details of your life with has NO Soul). Is realizing that every moment you shared with this person was FAKE. It wasn't real. 

The sociopath/narcissist has faked every emotion in order to manipulate you into believing they are normal with normal human emotions, just like you. 
They have pretended to love you, just to manipulate you into giving them what they want. 
How does one heal and recover from a deception so Big? You gave your time, energy, love and heart to someone, and you believed they loved you just as much. How does one ever trust again? Love again?  I

Once you have accepted the harsh reality for what it is. It's time to move on. 
It will Not be easy. The sociopath has left you feeling as if the energy/life force has been stolen right out of your soul. This is why healing takes time. You must take care of yourself, be good to yourself and never blame yourself for what happened. After all you were not this evil persons first victim and you will not be the last. This predator will continue this until their last day on this earth. They are simply soulless beings among us. 

Usually as soon as you begin the healing process, the narcissist will suddenly come back to your life, and they will say whatever they have to say to get you back. They will be that same great wonderful amaZing person you met in the beginning. Stay Strong! 

Remember THE NARCISSIST/SOCIOPATH WILL NEVER CHANGE. 

They are able to  fake emotions like. remorse,  sorrow, and even shame. They will act sorry to get you to forgive them for whatever they have done wrong.  They are NOT sorry though. They know exactly what they are doing and plan on doing it again. They actually do not see anything wrong with their behavior.  This is just how twisted they really are.

Narcissist/Sociopaths are serial cheaters.  Every single one of them. Rather it's a man or woman. Just like they are not capable of feeling empathy, they are not capable of being loyal. 



When you first caught them doing something wrong, they initially probably won you back fairly quickly or were able to deny any responsibility and convinced you they are not to blame. But after the 2nd, 3rd, even 4th time the issue came back up, you begin to have your suspicions. But of course the sociopath still tries to show you a great deal of sorrow, empathy and whatever other human emotions they know how to mimic, to manipulate you again. 

They can look so damn genuine, it's really mind blowing to know its all bullsh*t. 

They never feel bad that they have caused so much pain. They actually will feel bad for themselves, when you have had enough and are not so easily swayed and forgiving this 
time. So what started with them apologizing and acting remorseful soon turns to them blaming you (once they realize that you don't believe them) There anger comes raging out at this point, not because they feel bad about anything, their mask is starting to slip  because they were caught.






Wednesday, September 30, 2015

The social manipulation of a psychopath is endless

Obviously if you are reading this post, you have probably had some sorta encounter with a psychopath, sociopath, or narcissist. 

A common feature of the psychopath is accusing others of the very thing the psychopath does   (usually psycho's target, or person the psychopath feels is a threat, and could expose them)

Because psychopaths are excelled in lying. They can turn any situation into pure chaos,  confusion and misery. Psychopaths will often create dissent by playing parties against each other. The psychopaths mind set is to DIVIDE AND CONQUER by presenting one person a completely different story, than they had previously presented to another person. 

Psychopaths are often very difficult or impossible to detect, because they present themselves as genuine and caring. Especially to a potential victim. Once they hook their victim, the mask comes off, and the psychopaths ugly comes out. They are abusive, condescending, manipulative, mean-spirited Tyrants!  

Since the psychopath doesn't want others to KNOW their True Nature and Malicious Intentions, they will rarely act out in front of anyone but the victim. So there is usually no other people around to view their sinister activities. If the victim speaks out against the psychopath, the psychopath is able to make the victim look like a liar, who is mentally unstable. This is a very defeating feeling for the victim. The victim is isolated by the psychopath. 
The psychopath works to isolate their victim(s) in order to keep them quiet. The psychopath especially works hard to keep previous victims and the current victim apart. So they are unable to put together the lies, abuse, and vindictivenes. 

The variations that a psychopath will use on social manipulation are endless. The are professionals at this, they have been doing this to people all their life. 

Do not feel bad that you are unable to beat them at this game. It only means you are a genuine human being, with a kind soul. The psychopath lacks a soul, a heart, and any compassion. Having a soul is a beautiful thing. Underneath the psychopaths exterior is an ugly monster. 

Thursday, September 10, 2015

CrazyMakers.... Get out if you still can

Crazy makers... 

There are people in this world that are “crazy makers". 
These people will always set you up to lose.  
No matter how hard you try with these types you are sure to be damned if you do and damned if you don’t. 

They  put you in lose-lose situations. They have mastered manipulating others in random and various ways. These people will play mind games that are confusing, frustrating and down right cruel. 
There is no rhyme, reason, or emotional understanding of why these people do what they do. The best way to describe them is that they are crazy-makers. 

Crazy makers are abusers. Their behavior can not only be vindictive and malicious, but it can erode the other persons self esteem and self worth. This is their attempt to control you by means of confusing you, and making your life hard.

These "crazy makers" want you to feel insane, or worthless, it is how they are able to feel better about themselves. They are usually insecure people. People who feel good about themselves do not have to knock others down in order to feel superior. This is the only way they believe they can be loved, by causing the other person to feel as if no one else will love them or tolerate their "craziness" like the crazy maker. 

Being in a relationship with this disordered person feels like you’re caught in a whirlwind of chaos, with the life force being sucked from you as you are manipulated with nonstop crazy-making tactics. It's very mentally, physically, and spiritually exhausting to stay in a relationship with these types. 

If you are in a relationship with someone like this, try to get out of the relationship. You do not want to marry or have children with this type of person. As they will make your life miserable and will use children to do so. Severe the connection while you still can. It will save you much heartache, money, and problems in the future. 

Wednesday, September 2, 2015

Obsessive vindictive Exes

Unhealthy ex obsession occurs when an ex partner will stop at nothing to make the life of their ex unbearable and miserable. 

Even if the obsessive ex has moved on, and re-married the next “victim”.  They obsessive ex will still continue to believe that they have the right to abuse you.  They feel a sense of entitlement,  that even though they cheated on you, and left you, they pretend all of their horrible violations against you were/are justified. So when you try to move on with your life, they will be hell bent on making your life difficult. 

Often times, the obsessive ex wants things to be just as they were before they lied to you, cheated on you, destroyed your family, and drained your finances, energy, and spirit. Unstable people believe that all the rules apply to everyone but them. They believe that they are allowed to move on with a new partner, but they do not believe that their Ex is allowed to move on or be happy. Once the obsessive ex finds out that their ex has found someone, they become obsessed with making their ex life hell, and the man/woman that they have moved on with. They still want to control their Ex, they realize with a new someone that they may lose control. 

This type of behavior is delusional. The obsessive Ex has a sense of entitlement and unrealistic expectation. They believe that they are entitled to be with other people, but that their ex is not allowed to do so.

This is a very difficult situation to deal with. One begins to feel hopeless about ever moving forward and being happy. With an ex hell-bent on trying to make life as difficult as possible. New relationships seem impossible because the ex will attempt to destroy anything that may bring you happiness. And they have probably been successful at doing that since the beginning of the relationship, all the way to the end. 

It's important to remember that if you share children with this person, that to keep contact as simple and as minimal as possible. They vindictive ex will constantly be asking favors or demanding you do this or that, always using the children to manipulate you into doing. Important to remember, that they are only doing this to inconvenience you, and whatever they are demanding is probably exaggerated and is only meant to waste your time. Don't buy into it. Ignore 95% of any text or calls. When your children are with you, ignore 99% of text or calls, because you have the children, and there is no need to listen to the BS, that the ex is telling you that you MUST do, while your children are with you.  

Sunday, August 30, 2015

Sociopaths, Psycho's & Narcissist - The Most Dangerous Predators

Psychopaths lie to everybody because they are predators. 
If you are reading this, more than likely you have been attacked, hurt, betrayed, deceived, or discarded by a psychopath. 
You are well aware of how destructive and painful just knowing such a disordered individual can be. They are takers, not givers. They steal precious energy and time from you. stealers. It is a soul crushing reality check. It feels unfair that you were so unfortunate to have become entangled with a person that is unable to feel remorse, love, or care about the harm they have caused you and many many others. Yet they are still standing, and look as if they have never suffered any kind of loss, ever. 
While you feel your energy has been drained, you are alone, and completely defeated. 

Anytime with spent with a psychopath, is dangerous. If they don't kill you physically, they sure will kill you emotionally, spiritually, and mentally. The is no use in trying to get revenge on this morally corrupt individual, because they never fight fair. They  also have no conscience to stop them from completely ripping you to pieces. The more hurt they see they have caused, the more they will continue to rip into you. Your hurt is their motivation.

They have no care in the world, when you are their perceived target, they will have no qualms spending every minute of their day trying to destroy you. They will spread rumors to your friends, to people who barley know you, and warn people who don't know you, about you. The play the victim the whole time. Telling others how you have wronged them, how you are stalking them. When in truth, they are spending all of their time doing all of those things to you.  It doesn't cost the psychopath any energy to do these things, because they are using your energy to do it with, and probably using the energy from all their other victims. And believe me, there are many of victims.  You are not the first victim and you surely will Not be the last. 

Healing is your only option after being targeted by one of these predators. Do not think of ways to get revenge, because it will only drain more energy out of you. They have stolen enough of your precious energy. Focus on healing your mind, body and spirit. 

Tuesday, August 18, 2015

Oh the passive aggressive.... πŸ˜’

Narcissist, sociopaths, and the rest of the character disturbed individuals walking amongst us, are all emotional manipulators. What I have noticed in my years of dealing with these people, is that they all play the victim. Some may truly believe that they really are a victim of everyone else. 
They contribute everything in their life that has not gone the way they wanted it to, to be the fault of someone else. These people NEVER take responsibility for anything! They go through life blaming, accusing, hurting, refusing, arguing, hating, cheating, and lying. Their life seems to be one mishap after the next, yet they never question their own self, for these repetitive patterns of misery. They are hard wired to switch the blame onto others. They will cause the people involved with them to doubt their self and their sanity. Do not feel gullible or stupid if you have fallen prey to this kind of twisted manipulation. Normal and stable people are always the best victims for these types of people, because we are HUMAN, and have REAL HUMAN EMOTIONS. The important thing is that you realize that you are not to blame for the behaviors, actions, and insecurities of another person.
You are only responsible for your own behaviors. 

What I have seen in sociopaths and narcissist, is that they are 100% and fully aware of what they are doing to people. 
They are confident in their manipulation tactics. They see others as objects, not as human beings made up of flesh and blood with feelings and emotions. They don't feed anything for the pain they cause. In fact, they intentionally cause the pain, and enjoy keeping others on their toes, and walking on egg shells. They like to play games with their victims . They get some kind of sick pleasure of causing emotional turmoil, and devastation.

The Passive Aggressive Disordered individual on the other hand may have a conscience. In my own personal opinion, which is based on what I have seen and had the misfortune of interacting with. Is that the passive aggressive disordered person is an extremely insecure, broken person.
They do what they do because they live in fear of everything and everyone.
They are scared to be hurt, left, abandoned, alone, rejected, etc...
Passive aggressives are some of the most frustrating people to deal with because you never know what is genuine and what is not. So you find yourself questioning everything they say and do.
You  do not know what their true agenda is. It really sucks to have to wonder if the only reason they are doing something nice things for you, is so they can throw it in your face later...

It is exhausting! Dealing with a passive aggressive spouse can make one feel insane, angry, and hopeless. It's hard to leave one because you actually probably do feel sorry for them deep down, because you know they are NOT soulless and evil, like the sociopath. You see that there is pain behind their eyes. You know that you cannot heal that pain, and you know that they will not ever talk about the pain that is causing them to be this way. They deny being passive aggressive. It seems they blame YOU for everything wrong with their life. You know that you are not to blame, and you wonder if they really feel you are. Have they forgotten the others in their past that they blamed before you...? The passive aggressive is always going to flip anything you confront them with, deny and blame you. They are masters at making everything your fault. 
After so long, you stop confronting, you stop believing, you stop trying and you stop caring...  
It has become pointless to even try to help this person. Since they really feel they are the victim of your anger and demands.

Unlike the sociopath and narcissist, the passive aggressive really feels like the victim. Yes,  they do play the victim well, and you know it is all crap. But in their mind, they actually believe they are genuine victims of anyone closely involved with them. They yearn to be loved, yet they alienate those who love(d) them with their inability to take responsibility for ANYTHING.

Passive aggressive people simply want you to feel sorry for them, because they actually really feel sorry for themselves, and they need someone to make them feel valid in their feelings. If you do not sympathize with the passive aggressive, they just feel more victimized and become more shut down.
If you don't sympathize with the sociopath, they throw you out like garbage and will find someone else who will. They quickly move on to their next victim who will buy their lies and bullsh*t.

The sociopath, plays the part of the victim but remains aware that being the Victim will be beneficial to them in getting their way. 
The sociopath knows that good people will feel pity for them, and they can use that guilt to manipulate. The sociopath is depending on others ability to feel guilt. Since the sociopath him/herself lacks that ability to feel guilt. Due to the fact that they are without a conscience or soul. 


Sunday, August 16, 2015

pSycHoPatH

Sociopaths and psychopaths are a subgroup of human beings. They look so much like your normal ‘soccer mom’ or ‘supportive dad’ that it is very hard to detect them. The only people who really know the true persona of the psychopath is the ones that must live with them, or have been targeted by them. 

But these people are so traumatized by the psychopath, they will not speak up against them, for they fear the wrath they would surely suffer if they do. 

These predators walk among us everyday.  They cause  a great deal of pain to other human beings. They wreak havoc everywhere they go in the world, with  their cruelty, manipulation, deception and power plays. 

Psychopaths have no worries about any of the pain the cause. They are able to hurt people and animals, and never feel anything for the pain they cause. There is absolutely no empathy or remorse there ever. 



Psychopaths are out there! They are willing to take advantage of the weak, strong, young, elderly and anyone who looks like a viable target.  
They know what they are doing. 
They don't care.  
They are aware that they are ruining someone's life, that is why they are doing it.
Some psychopaths (most actually) will consider it a bonus if they make you so miserable and hopeless that you commit suicide. Most victims are unlikely to know what they are dealing with. 
It's hard to fathom that people exist out there who are capable of theses heinous acts. So majority of us do not know what to look out for, or even how to handle one.


Sunday, August 9, 2015

SoCioPatH and ReVEnGe

ReVEnGE 



We realize that to attempt to get revenge against someone who has no moral qualms, no conscience, and no limits on what they will do to cause pain is a wasted effort on our part. Any move you make, you know that the sociopath will make a counter move even more damaging than anything you are capable of or can even imagine. The Sociopath has no limits to what they will do to ruin another. They are completely soulless, heartless, and their seems to be not an ounce of humanity in them. 

Sociopaths are far more skilled in Revenge than we are. 

It is a natural human response that when we are attacked, want defend ourselves. When we cannot  defend ourself, and we continue to get attacked. Eventually we begin to want to get revenge. 
Sociopaths are skilled at lying, manipulating, and abusing. They lack normal human emotions..
So whatever you do to the sociopath or want to do, is not going to affect them much. They will simply just move on and continue their destructive lifestyle. 
Remember, sociopaths don’t care about the future. They only care about themselves and getting what they want, ‘right here and right now’.  They do not care how they damage their children, their parents. They feel no responsibility for NO ONE, not even themselves. They expect someone else to be responsible for getting their needs met. 

The sociopath will always be intent on making your life as difficult as possible.

It's important for your own sanity to remember that the sociopath will take a person down as far as they can, and then they will back off, and suddenly try to act nice, make promises to reform or just simply behave as normally as possible while the individual regains their strength (assuming that they are not totally depleted) and then the sociopath begins the vicious all over again. Of course, if the person is so down and depleted, that they have nothing left to give to the sociopath, the sociopath sees them as too pathetic to use and manipulate anymore, and they simply just move on, to their next victim....

Friday, August 7, 2015

Sociopaths and Narcissist Both Cheat, but for different reasons..

Sociopaths and Narcissit are both serial cheaters. They cannot be faithful ever! 
Male or Female. Narcissist or Sociopath. They are all cheaters, in every way.  They cheat their way through life, they have affairs with other people while in relationship or marriage. Just like they not capable of the truth or remorse, they are also not capable of being loyal to anyone. 

Sociopaths and narcissists have different motivations for cheating. 

A narcissist, is truly a very insecure person. Even though they come off very self assured and confident. The narcissist cheats to build his/her ego. It is a constant source of narcissistic supply and reassurance. They do not feel good or energized with one partner. Their ego needs to be stroked and fed. This is how they get their narcissistic supply. And it's YOU ( the one person who has supported and loved them ) that will pay the price. And that is ok with the narcissist. You love them and they believe they will always be able to manipulate you into forgiving them. They will take advantage of your love and kindness just because they can...

A Sociopath on the other hand cheat because... well they can. Sociopaths feel entitled to do whatever they want, and expect to suffer no consequences, or ever even be held accountable. Sociopaths take what they want because they want it. 
There is no moral issue involved as far as they are concerned. Since the sociopath believes they are entitled to anything and deserve everything, they recognize NO RuLeS that apply to them. They believe there can be no violation against and no wrong. The rules normal people  follow, do not apply to the sociopath. This is what makes the sociopath very very dangerous. There is no limits on what they can do, and since they are without any conscience, they are capable of horrible things. Sociopaths have absolutely no sympathy  to the damage they do to innocent people.

To a sociopath, cheating is like a game where she/he maneuvers the man/woman into giving her/him what they want, and  it has no special meaning to them, though they will do everything to make you think otherwise. Sociopaths are all con artist. They are skilled pretenders and liars. 

You will notice that to both a sociopath and a narcissist, they think they can  have sex with many others, and arrogantly say  “Hey, I've still got it, I'm good looking. I'm irresistible.” But, to get what they want, they will focus on YOU, feeding you what they know you want to hear. They make you believe you are special, but in fact, you are like are just another thing  to be used. They are sick and twisted and cause so much pain and hurt to anyone who knows them. 
The sociopath and narcissist  both wreak havoc and destruction on the lives of the innocent.
There is only one way to deal with one once you have discovered that they are this way. 
It is to get far, far away from them. SEVER ALL TIES AND CUT OFF ALL CONTACT, immediately and totally.

Wednesday, August 5, 2015

Narcissist Thrive on Emotional Reactions




Narcissist thrive on evoking both reactions and emotions from their victims.

The narcissist wants you to respond to their unrealistic demands. They are aware of what they are doing, that's exactly why they do it. When the narcissist isn't treating you like garbage or like your existence is irrelevant, they will be doing or saying things to cause you pain. Most victims do not understand the person they are in love with lacks the ability to Love them back. They believe they are to blame. They do not understand why they are being rejected.  So they keep trying to please.  
The narcissist sees this as weakness and continues to allow their victim to be in pain, by rejecting them, cheating on them, and lying to them. 

It is hard to get through to the narcissists victim at this time. But eventually the victim will have enough. Unfortunately by the time the victim realizes this, they have been beaten down 
emotionally. They are depleted of energy and hope. It usually can take the victim years to 
get over their ordeal with the narcissist. And in all truth, the abuse they suffered cannot be forgotten. 

Don't lose hope if this is you. Once you have gotten the narcissist out of your life. Begin to LIVE again. Focus on healing your mind, body, and soul. 



Tuesday, August 4, 2015

The sociopath will NEVER change. Ever

Sociopaths,  narcissist, psychopaths, and also the dark triad personality disordered person  has mastered how to attack and retreat. This is how they keep their victims off balance. They sociopath undermines the victim and works to lower the victims self esteem, confidence and independence 
Abusive sociopaths suffers from internal discomfort and conflicts that they have no clue how to deal with, due to their lack of being able to genuinely connect to others. Sociopaths do not have much practical and logical thinking inside their mind. Rational reasoning, kindness, and empathy, is just NOT there.  They do so many damaging things to their victim  is to compensate or satisfy their own insecurities. Sociopaths and narcissist will work  hard to give others the impression that they are Confident, self assured, independent, and basically “awesome” Human beings.
The sociopath does not ever look within themselves.  Because “within" them is hollow and empty. They don't seek to understand or respect others because they do not understand or respect themselves. The ONLY understanding the sociopath wants to find is how to better manipulate and control their victim.
The Truth is that narcissist and sociopaths are very insecure. The narcissist more so than the sociopath. The narcissist is very skilled at hiding their  own weaknesses. Their strategy is to make the victim look ‘unstable, dangerous, and suffering from low self esteem. The sociopath hides their insecurity and self-hatred by exploiting others, and portraying them as weak. 
Since these abusive types of people CaNNoT control their own life, and (malicious) emotions, they try to control others, through manipulation, lies, threat, blackmail, and for a lack of better words, causing their victims to doubt their self, and feel unworthy and not good enough. While if these malicious types may have some positive qualities. Although I have never seen anything positive come from a sociopath, ever ..  
The narcissistic sociopath will always hold very toxic and unrealistic expectations of victims and their family members, these expectations are to ridiculous to ever really met. Those who try to meet these expectations will become exhausted and drained. The sociopath convinces them that they a failure, and they will constantly berate them, and be verbally abuse. This is a game that the sociopath loves to play with people in their life. The sociopath has mastered this "game" and they know it is a game that they will win, and that their victims cannot win. 
Narcissist and sociopaths are ABUSERS. It's vital for all victims of these vile individuals to remember, the abuse more than likely has nothing to do with you. If they are not abusing You, they would be abusing someone else. They abuse family members as long as the family member stays in the sociopath life. The actions of the abuser are not Your fault. Even though the sociopath will have you convinced and brainwashed that you are to blame for anything they may have done to hurt you.  One of the hardest things to accept and understand is You will have little or no impact on the sociopath. They will never change. They are wired the way they are. They aren't suffering from a mental illness, but they have a malevolent personality and are basically soulless. So never expect these types to change. There may be a temporary change but it will not be lasting. It is only another tactic to get back in your life, once they do the abuse will start again. 
The abusers seldom wants to change.  Narcissist don't believe  that there is anything wrong with them. Sociopaths (this is my opinion) either know there is something wrong with them but refuse to admit it. Or they are so delusional. They really feel like the circumstances of their life and how it has turned out, is truly the fault of everyone else - but not them...they are never at fault. seldom want to put any real effort towards changing. Victims of sociopaths and narcissist often believe they can change them, and often end up blaming themselves for the state of the relationship.
The narcissistic sociopath wants to control you. And when you stay after all the abuse they subject you to. They feel in control of you
GET AWAY FROM YOUR ABUSER ASAP. It never gets better. It only gets worse 


 

Saturday, August 1, 2015

Never React but always Remember and Document



Being a victim of a sociopath, I have learned how destructive, cruel and damaging they can are to ones emotional, mental and physical health. Some may have noticed this blog NEVER uses any names to point out a specific sociopath. The blog authors name is not real. 
Why? Because I am not here to defame or character assassinate anyone. Not even a sociopath.

This blog is to help the victims of sociopaths, narcissist and other dark personalities better understand how these cruel individuals operate, so if one ever becomes targeted by a sociopath, one will know what they are up against. 

I learned the hard way... I reacted to every single false accusation being made up about me by the sociopath. Little did I know at the time, my reacting was what the sociopath wanted.
The sociopath relies on their victims emotions to bait them into their trap. Sociopaths do not have the emotions that genuine human beings have, such as guilt, shame, love, and hurt. 
They only feel anger, entitlement, hate, and revenge. 

The sociopath does covert things to the target, and makes it seem as if they are supported by others. The Internet is one of the sociopaths favorite new weapons of destruction. While the Internet is also used by amazing individuals to do good. It can also be used to hurt, destroy and defame innocent people. 
One way to know if one is being genuine or just attempting to destroy another person reputation is the use of names. Using a person first, last and even surname followed by hate accusation is a RED FLAG. 

When normal healthy minded people have a problem with a person, they maybe upset, but they don't set out to destroy their life and reputation. The sociopath will immediately begin to destroy a person with spreading embarrassing, harmful lies. They will make sure that when their targets name is googled or looked up via Internet, that the slander will appear on the first page. This harms one from employment and future employment. This makes the victim feel helpless, powerless and hated. That's the goal of the sociopath, to convince the target that they have people on their side, and are supported. When they usually are not. Any supporter who leave comments on the sociopath slander campaign, are usually left by the sociopaths other aliases. 

The best way to handle a sociopath who is determined to destroy you by spreading rumors to anyone who will listen is to NOT REACT. They are counting on you reacting emotionally. They will use your genuine against you. They now are able to say "look, I told you he/she was unstable". Although you are not unstable, you are human with human emotions that sociopath lacks. The sociopath will twist and manipulate your assumedly appropriate emotional reaction to make you look crazy, unstable and even dangerous. 

It is VERY DIFFICULT to NOT react to the awful things the sociopath is doing to you. But I am telling from personal  experience.  It is in your best to not react, but to document, document, document. Save everything. Because the sociopath will continue to do vicious things in order to get a reaction. They WILL eventually cross the line, and you will have everything you need to take legal action. It will show that you were harassed, stalked, slandered by the sociopathic person, and by not reacting they have nothing on you. 

Saturday, July 25, 2015

Psychopaths, sociopaths and Narcissist


Sociopaths, psychpaths, and narcissist have similiar traits. But they are are actually different. In my research I have found all in all they all destroy lives. They all shatter self esteem, rob people of their quality of living and hope. 

Psychopaths, Sociopaths and narcissist know exactly what they are doing to their victim. In fact they know what they are going to do to their victim before they do it. 

Psychopaths, sociopaths, and narcissist are able to sound as if they have a good sense and that they are of sound reasoning. They come across as charming and innocent. All people, even trained doctors may find that these disorders individuals seem to be pleasant people, that are fully functioning and have high capabilities. 

Psychometric tests also very frequently show the psychopath of superior intelligence. They may conclude that the sociopath is smarter than the average person. Both the sociopath and psychopath can appear brilliant. But it is the sociopath who is of average intelligent but has just convinced us that she/he is smarter than us all. The Narcissisit is likely to seem free from social or emotional impediments, from the minor distortions, peculiarities, and awkwardnesses so common even among the successful. 
The sociopath and the narcissist have shown many superficial characteristics and they are not universal, but they are very common.
The psychopath on the other hand is very smart, and rarely makes mistakes that will get him or her caught. Unlike the sociopath whose life begins to unravel around the age of 45 (especially the female sociopath). 
Old debts will catch up, and people have caught on to the scheme of the sociopath, and are no longer willing to do their dirty work for them. The sociopath being impulsive and having little self control, has probably been married over 3 times at this point, and is unable to keep a job. She relies on child support from the ex-spouses whom she has children with. The community is no stranger to his/her behaviors. 

The psychopath on the other hand is able to keep a steady job. And what the psychopath does is calculated and planned out. There are no holes in his story. Many sociopaths and psychopaths never commit murder. But all are capable of murder. A psychopath thinks about losing the ir freedom if they are caught for such acts, where is a sociopath is so impulsive, they do not think and do not care. They are only interested in themselves and what they want in that moment. 

Sociopaths (at least the ones I have observed) can only be “functioning” for so long... Before they get caught for the many deceptive things they do. They are very spiteful, jealous, angry individuals. They hate people who are successful, have a lot of money, or work hard. The sociopath wants all those things, but doesn't want to work to get them. 
There is a sense of entitlement there. They believe they are entitled to a BIG piece of the pie, even if they did nothing to earn or deserve. They will take credit for everyone else's hard work, and they never will acknowledge the person who actually deserves the credit. In fact they will end up destroying the person. Mentally, emotionally, financially, physically, and spiritually in order to make sure that the person cannot speak out against them. 

One thing that the psychopath, narcissist, and sociopath all have in common is they all have NO EMPATHY FOR ANY FORM OF LIFE. They have no emotional connection to others {all though they are able to fake sympathy and concern VERY well. But they truly do not care, they NEVER WILL care, and there is nothing you can ever in this life do to make them care. They are EMPTY, hollow, shallow and ruthless people who will look you in the eyes, smile and then turn around and destroy you every chance they get 

Sunday, July 19, 2015

Narcissistic Sociopath - NEVER takes any responsibility

A narcissistic sociopath will never take responsibility for anything. 
A sociopath always puts on a good show. Pretending to care and be compassionate. But he/she has no compassion. The sociopath only knows how to show compassion because she/he has seen someone else show this emotion. Compassion and sympathy are alien to them. 
Sociopaths make promises that they NEVER intend to keep. 

Sociopaths abandon those who care about them, especially at the most critical of times in their lives. 
The sociopath is a cheater. She/he cheats and does not care of the pain it will cause to their spouse/children or anyone else. The sociopath ONLY cares about getting their needs met, no matter how sick they are. 
Narcissist and Sociopaths sometimes will act stunned that the person is hurt by their infidelities.
Their emotional logic is not there. They do not think like normal, healthy, caring human beings.
They are soulless.... 

Sociopaths will disappear for hours and even days. Not telling anyone where they are. Then the sociopath will reappear as if everything is normal. They expect others to go along with this, and if anyone confronts them, they will lash out at them, they will try to switch the focus off of them, and turn it around on whoever is confronting them. Sometimes convincing the victim it is their fault, the victim may even end up apologizing. 

They cause their victims anxiety, stress and heartbreak. The sociopath will NEVER explain what they’ve been up to. They will though always make excuses, and tell More lies. The sociopath blames everyone else. And it is always someone else’s fault why they behaved a certain way, did something immoral, all without admitting what they did was wrong. 

It is a waste of time and energy to argue with a sociopath. It is easier to squeeze blood out of a 
stone than to get a sociopath to admit that they were wrong or even to apologize.

Sociopaths cheat and abandon their husbands and wives. The only reason a sociopath will act as if they are concerned for their children is to continue to manipuale  and control their ex. 
The reality is that the sociopath does not have the slightest concern about anyone but themselves.

Sociopaths may not commit crimes like murder, but they are capable of anything. Most of their crimes are smaller crimes but have a significant effect on their victims. A sociopath is so "good" at what they do that they often do not get caught and convicted for these crimes that devastate many lives.  

It is not worth your time and energy to try to expose a sociopath. It is more beneficial for you to walk away and get the sociopath completely out of your life. If you share children with them, then 
be patient. As the children get older, you will find that you can have less contact with the sociopath.

If the sociopath is a man, he will usually lose interest in his children and that will be the best 
thing for you and your children. As much as a child needs a father - REMEMBER THAT THIS PERSON IS A MONSTER, and EVIL. He has no compassion and unable to empathize or really care about anyone but himself and it is best that he dissapears from your child's life. As all interaction is toxic and could permanently damage your child's emotional well being 
If the sociopath is a woman - this is more difficult. The sociopathic female doesn't want her mask to slip. If she was to forget about her children, she risk being exposed for the cold heartless monster she is.  She is smart enough to know that society views women as mothers and natural nurturers. So she will want custody of the children for face value only. She puts on a show for others that she is the best mommy in the world, she tries to play the Susie soccer mom role. Also she see her children as her meal ticket. She will drain the wallet of her ex and the father of her children.

Not only will his finances suffer. He will also be drained emotionally and physically. She will wear him down, belittle him, turn his children against him. The female sociopath is like a blood sucking tick. She latches on and will not let go until she has bled him dry. 
THIS IS A DIFFICULT SITUATION FOR THE MAN. He loves his children. He wants to be a good father but to do so he must endure all the manipulation and torment that his sociopathic ex wife will do. 
In a situation like this it is important for the man to be in his children's life. They truly need him, he is the only stable figure they have and can rely on. It is hard, but once he children get older, it gets easier. The man will be able to communicate with his children without having to go through the sociopath.  Of course she will contest this. Because she wants to be in control. She will do everything she can to get control back. It's important for the man to not give in to her manipulations. As soon as the man realizes his children are able to communicate their needs 
and make decisions, that is when ALL CONTACT SHOULD BE CUT OFF WITH THE FEMALE SOCIOPATH. She will be consistent in trying to get any response. Never respond. Change your number. 


Sunday, July 5, 2015

The unpredictable, unstable, obsessive EX

It is always hard when a relationship ends, a divorce or break up takes place. But when the relationship was/is toxic, it is in the best interest of our Emotional Health and Stability to end toxic relationships. 
Toxic individuals do not change. They may seek counseling, but they do not seek it because they genuinely want to change and be better persons.. The only reason a toxic person agrees to counseling or help, is so that their victim "believes" that they are trying hard to change. Once they have their victim believing that they have changed, the abuse (lying, manipulating, cheating, stealing) will start again, and continue until they are caught again. 

TOXIC PEOPLE WASTE SO SO SO MUCH OF OUR TIME, AND THEY SIMPLY DO NOT CARE. You cannot make them feel bad or remorseful, because they do not have a conscience. They lack inner depth and love. When a person does not have consciousness and awareness of the feelings and pain of others, they are capable of terrible and evil things. 
Just look at how they recklessly live. They have no concern for their own life. Much less the life of anyone else. 

When the toxic relationship ends, because you have had enough. Even though you are able to let go and you are ready to move forward in life, doesn't mean the toxic person is.  
Even if it is the toxic person ENDS the relationship, and moves on to another person. They will still feel the need to punish you every chance they can get.  Especially if you decide to move on as well and begin to see other people and date again. Once the toxic person finds out you are moving on and thinks you may even be Happy, that is when they may become obsessed with getting you back, reconciling, or just making your life miserable. 

This behavior becomes an obsession.  Your ex develops an unhealthy and dangerous obsession with you. If you have children with this person, your situation can become so miserable that you begin to feel hopeless. 

This is called the obsessive EX syndrome. It is when your Ex-Wife/Husband will stop at nothing to make your life unbearable and miserable. They will even use their own children as mass weapons of destruction to punish you and make your suffering even worse. 

Even if the ex has moved on, even re-married. Often times, the obsessive ex that you are dealing with wants you to still give to them, do things for them, and be around when they call.  They are very delusional, they truly believe that they are allowed  to move on with their new partner, but they do not believe that YOU (their Ex) is allowed to move on or be happy. Once your obsessive ex finds out that you have found someone else, they become obsessed with making your  life hell. They do not stop with just tormenting you.  They also will harass and stalk the man/woman that you have moved on with. They will use the children that you share to hurt you. They do not CARE, the psychological damage they are causing their Own children. As long as they are in control. They want to control You. This is usually because the  obsessive Ex realizes that if You find someone else, they will lose the control they have had on you for so long. 
This type of behavior is delusional, and it can become very dangerous. They may not harm you physically but they find Many other ways to harm you. Such as accusing you of abuse, physical and emotional, they will turn the children against you, and slander you to friends, colleagues and the entire community. An obsessive ex knows what they are doing, but justifies it to their own self. They are selfish, but are too self centered and narcissistic to take responsibility for anything in their life that they are doing or that they have done.  These people do not always have a chemical brain imbalance. They usually just lack compassionate for anyone, anything, except themselves. They have a sense of entitlement, and they expect impossible and unrealistic 
expectations for everyone — EXCEPT FOR THEMSELVES! 

This can be extremely hard for you, but you must be strong. I have found that once the children get older that you must apply the NO CONTACT RULE. This is helpful. But it takes a significant amount of time before your unstable ex leaves you alone. 

Tuesday, June 9, 2015

The lies, rumors and pain that come with a sociopath

 When we have been abused, betrayed, lied to, cheated on, had rumors spread about us, lost friends, felt isolated, been afraid, lost everything, doubted ourselves, felt guilty, believed it was our fault - more than likely we were in a relationship with a sociopath. Or we were friends, or have a sociopathic family member.  

Once we discovered the truth, and realized we are not the only victim of this person, who had some how destroyed our life, our soul, and left us with little to no trust in the world. We are able to begin healing from the traumatic experience. Healing takes time. We are weak, alone, afraid, and don't know who we can trust.

The hardest part of healing is feeling safe and facing the world. 

We want to withdraw, because the sociopath has said so many horrible things about us, we feel shame. AND THIS IS EXACTLY WHAT THE SOCIOPATH WANTS US TO FEEL. 

When my sociopath spread rumors about me all over town — to my child's  school, to my neighbors, to people who i respected in the community. I was afraid to leave the house. I was afraid of what others were thinking about me. What lies had my sociopath told everyone? And did anyone believe those lies. My sociopath alread had a reputation in town for stealing, and abusing drugs and sleeping around, so why would people believe the lies that were being  spread?

I felt that people would rather believe the bad they have heard about you - rather than the good. It seems people don't go around talking about the good about you. But they will go around talking about anything bad about you - even if it's not true.

For a while I felt isolated from the world. I did not want to leave my home. 
Even though the people who knew me, knew the hardships I had been through with this sociopath. They new that this person was very dangerous and hated me for moving on with my life. The sociopath wanted and still wants to hurt me, and make my life unbearable. I'm not sure why.. Boredom, or because I moved on and found someone who loves me for me and we were happy. 
What I have noticed is that all Sociopaths are jealous of everyone. 

Since there is nothing real authentic and genuine about the sociopath, and they don't understand or care to understand emotions. They just see everyone as a conquest, or threat. Not as humans, who feel pain. There is not much "humanness" in a sociopath.. And when they get done with you, you may feel they stole some part of your humanness.

A close friend of mine has been dealing with a vindictive female sociopath.  It is his ex wife. He has been divorced from the sociopath for over 9 years and separated for over 14. She had numerous affairs after they adopted their 2nd child. Finally after one of the affairs became very public due to the fact the man she was cheating with was married, and they both held prominant careers in the community, he filed for divorce. He has been through hell and back. This is his story, in his words...
  
When I went no contact and chose to ignore my sociopath, that's when things got very ugly. I refused 
to communicate with the ex. So my ex decided to tell everyone, and put it on social media that i was a "cyber stalking troll". Even using my first and last name to slander me. My ex made up a fake domain site in my name. Pretending to be me, and impersonating me in an unfavorable manner.  Basically painting a picture of a very unstable person, that was trying to get help for my mental problems. The worst part was if you googled my name, the website that my ex started about me was the first thing that came up. That is  when I said “ENOUGH IS ENOUGH.”

I contacted a friend of mine who is a police officer. And I ask what could be done about this website that my ex started about and was impersonating me in such a way. It was slander and defamation.
My friend informed me that it was cyber stalking, and I should file a police report. — so I did 
that. 

Which only made my ex crazier. Although the website was taken down, I was now being
accused of more horrific things. Now my sociopath ex wife was going to social media, claiming how she felt afraid for her children, because I was unstable, she believed I would kidnap them at a soccer game or from school. This was horrible because I felt afraid to go to my sons soccer game, because I didn't know what she would do or say, she had went to Facebook, and Twitter pretending to be living a life of fear because of me. 
What I began to notice was a pattern. She may have went to social media bashing me, but she expected me to pick up kids on my weekend. This is when I realized how unstable and deranged she was. She was only looking to ruin my reputation in the community, she still expected me to get the kids (even though she claimed she was in fear for their safety) 

I felt confused. I wanted to get my children. But with the unpredictable ex, I didn't know if I was being set up. Was I going to show up at the school to get my children, and the cops would be waiting to arrest me? Would my kids even be there, considering she loved leading me on wild gooses chases just to waste my time and make things difficult on me? 
I decided my children were worth whatever risk. And after all I had filed a complaint against her for impersonation and cyber stalking (which set her off to go on a rampant on social media) Bit it was still documentation, if my ex had something sinister planned. I remember so many times going to pick them up, feeling so much anxiety. Anxiety and fear consumed me. This woman had no limits and would not hesitate to destroy me, my new wife, and even my step daughter, who was at the time very little (5 years old). Sociopaths are so low, they will destroy children (even their own) just to hurt another person. 

I wondered if this crap would ever stop. I felt hopeless... I began to stop looking online, and begin to focus only on myself my children and healing. It was very tempting to want to get online and see what my ex was saying now.but I never did. I gave it a good eight months before I looked at anything my ex was doing online. I still do not look up my ex'a online activity. 

Wednesday, June 3, 2015

Happiness is easy - Once you delete the toxic people

Happiness is actually quite simple.

Delete the toxic people in your life.. You know who they are. 
They are the people who constantly demand more from you. What you have given them is never enough. They always want more. The demands are unrealistic and ridiculous. 
You find yourself exhausted and tired. You have no energy physically and mentally. Just getting a simple text message from them, stresses you out.

These toxic people truly do not care about your well being. They don't care if their demands are causing you to feel sick. It feels like they are trying to make you drop dead with their constant ridiculous demands. 

These people use to guilt to manipulate you to do what they want. They are experts at using others to hurt you, and hurt everyone else they know. 

You are not their only victim
They do this to everyone that is in their life, ex- partners, siblings, parents, children. These people have FEW close friends because of their selfishness and toxicity. You will find anyone who is their “close” friend usually reside out of state. That is the only way to keep a friendship with a toxic person. 

Toxic people TAKE TAKE TAKE. 
They never GIVE anything back. 
A relationship with a toxic person is so draining because you are the only one giving and working to make the relationship work. 

Toxic people DO NOT care about the people they hurt when they CHEAT, LIE, and ABUSE. If children are involved, they do not think about how their actions will affect the children. You can guarantee that after you have divorced, they will use the children as a way to hurt, control, and manipulate you. 
They are the first to say – “do you care about your children, do you know what you are doing to them?”   
They want to beat it into your head that you are a bad parent, if you say no to their demands. It doesn't matter how much you actually do, they never mention that. They just beat you down when you say NO to one of their many outrageous demands. Painting you out to be a horrible parent that doesn't give a crap about your children. 
They will tell you that you are a cruel person that doesn't care about your kids. All because you said No to them. This is typical narcissistic/ sociopathic behavior and traits. 

THERE IS NO RATIONALITY BEHIND THE THINGS THESE PEOPLE SAY. The more you can ignore them, block them from your phone, never speak to them, the happier your life will become. They NEVER change. 
If they are not tormenting you, I will bet they are tormenting someone else.