The OBSESSED Narcissist

The narcissist has a difficult time knowing what is real, and what is a delusional that they made up in their crazy minds..

As a DSM-IV trait, the narcissisit's need to fend off inner emptiness, feel special and in control, and avoid feeling defective. The narcissist can become so delusional that they are bordering on a fine line between their own delusions and what is actually real.  

As unhealthy this is for the narcissist, it is even more unhealthy for people in he narcissist life. And it usually will turn into to gaslighting for the narcissistic individuals family members. It causes them confusion, frustration, and delusional thinking...

A person trying to end a relationship or cut ties with a narcissist has a difficult doing so, because the narcissist becomes the person you always wanted them to be. Nice..but it is all an act... To get you to take them back so they can control and treat you like crap again. 

The narcissistic person becomes obsessed with their partner when the partner is not responding, and trying to have no contact. They are obsessed with getting the  CONTROL, they once had back. They can't stand the fact that someone has actually rejected them. Especially their partner, who they have viewed as weak and pathetic. They will not like the fact that you have made a good and healthy decision for yourself - which was to no longer be a part of their dysfunction! 

When the relationship is over, the narcissist can actually do become dangerously obsessed with their ex-partner.  

After failed attempts to get their ex back, the disordered narcissist will resort to stalking, destroying property, verbal attacks, ridiculous demands, and obsessive calling, emailing and obsessively text messaging. 

People with Narcissistic Personality Disorder confuse the intensity they feel with intimacy. They do not know how to have healthy, loving, and intimate relationships. 

Being in a narcissistic relationship is painful. Narcissist cheat, lie and treat their partners as if they mean nothing to them.  The relationship is built around infidelity, the narcissist huge EGO and control. 

(The narcissist can also be jealous and fear losing control but it has more to do with maintaining their narcissistic supply source)

The fact is, that there are some people who are just unable to mentally “let go” of their partner after a break up — especially if there were children as a result from the relationship.

It is difficult to end a relationship with narcissist. The narcissist will keep calling, keep visiting, keep arguing and trying to reconcile. All while still having sex with other people. THE NARCISSIST NEVER CHANGES, THEY WILL ONLY PRETEND TO BE WHAT YOU WANT UNTIL THEY GET THAT CONTROL BACK.

The non-disordered person may take the narcissist back a few times before they realize that nothing will ever become better. 

Once you end the relationship for GOOD with the narcissist, you may be followed, stalked, threatened, put downed, and called nasty names by your ex. 

When left unaddressed, in extreme cases the disordered Narcissist becomes obsessed  and it may progress to the point that they will use the children to get their ex to respond, and if those tactics don't work they may threaten to hurt the children. 

Narcissist manipulate their ex by using the children. But when that DOES NOT work. The narcissist becomes desperate and angry - they are willing to do whatever they must to make contact with their ex.  

The narcissist knows their ex loves the children, then the disordered person will attempt to hurt their ex by hurting the children. 

In extreme cases they will actually cause harm to their children. Even kidnapping the child (children) from school or by refusing to return the child after their visitation is up. 

Narcissist and Sociopaths have very many similiar traits. The sociopath is usually more ruthless in their tactics to gain control or get what they want.

Psychopaths

The psychopath is by far the most destructive, the most successful, and the least understood.  It's hard to know you are dealing with a ruthless psychopath unless you have been targeted and victimized by one. It's hard to recognize what you are dealing with until you see her/him do something that requires them to have a conscience. 

You are more likely to find psychopaths who come from wealthy families and who are CEO's, attorneys in a position of higher power (like a prosecutor, district attorney of high profile murder cases) than a psychopath that is from the wrong side of the tracks.

Psychopaths have no empathy. Empathy is the ability to experience within oneself, the feelings and emotions expressed by others. It is what allows us to feel what others are feeling. Empathy allows us to experience the life, to be truly alive, and it is one of the defining characteristics of what makes us human. Psychopaths may look human, but they are far from human. They have more primal animal instincts than human instincts.

Psychopaths realize at an early age that they are different, but they they try to act as everyone else does, in order to be accepted into society. They mimic what they see others do, such as pretending to care and be genuine. Acting like a human would but they can never understand why they should act this way.

Psychopaths live in a false reality in a world that they themselves have constructed. They think highly i themselves. They believe they are better and smarter than everyone else. A psychopath is a megalomaniac. They think of their needs and no one else's. 

Psychopaths have a overblown sense of entitlement.   Psychopaths are irresponsible because they refuse to ever admit that they make mistakes (another trait that makes of human) Psychopaths will never admit that they are at fault, either because their warped and twisted mind actually believes they are incapable of being at fault or because it's easier to blame someone else. Either way they will always claim nothing is ever their fault... Psychopaths believe that nothing wrong can ever originate with them and so their logic dictates that everything bad is always someone else's fault. (this is why they spend a majority of their life blaming and accusing)

The psychopath makes us second guess ourself. They will attempt to make us feel like the “crazy” one.  As most of us who have been targeted by the ruthless psychopath, we have realized that they are masters of manipulation, and experts on knowing how to push our buttons to use our emotions against us. They do this to keep those around them confused, unable to think clearly, and off balance. 

A psychopath spends their entire life faking being human. This gives them the ability to assume the roles of virtuous public servant, the perfect mother, the perfect husband, advisor, mentor, and pillar of the community. In addition when things get rough they have no inhibitions in playing dirty and readily resort to character assassination, persecution, and even murder..

You cannot change the psychopath.  You cannot reform them, you cannot find the goodness inside them, you cannot show them the way to god, and you cannot teach them about love. The psychopath can never understand and they do not care to understand. While they may lead you to believe that you are getting through to them, in reality, your empathy only makes them hate and loathe you more, they do not admire you for your attempts or  your compassion, they despise you even more. While you try to 'understand' the psychopath, they are secretly calculating how they can destroy you. 

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The Obsessed, Dangerous, and Desperate Sociopath

Sociopaths are toxic. They destroy others. They inflict emotional harm on family, ex spouses, spouses, children, and even strangers. Sociopaths will never leave you alone. Most ex spouses of a sociopath will usually  try to have "NO CONTACT" because of the harassment they receive on an everyday basis. 

The sociopath will obsessively call, text, email and harass. It can become so frequent, it disrupts the victims work, personal life, and peace. 

No Contact Does Not Always Work

Even when the victim establishes no contact with the sociopath, refusing to return or answer calls, not responding to text messages, or emails. The sociopath does not always get bored with you, and move on to their next victim. Sometimes they become obsessed with you. They will become desperate just to get a tiny response from you. They will make up lies to try to get a response. Some will tell you that they have a terminal illness (such as stage 4 ovarian cancer). Knowing you are not a monster, you probably will respond, because a normal person with a normal brain, will feel sad, and guilty to ignore someone who is supposedly “dying” . A person with an abnormal brain, that lacks so conscience and no heart is the only kind of person who will tell you they are dying when they are not, just to get you to respond. 

Why does a sociopath go to such extremes just to get a response?

                 CONTROL

The sociopath wants control. They had control over you at one time and they intended on keeping control over you. So when you move on with your life, and no longer allow the sociopath to control your life. They become desperate to get that control back. The sociopath can become most dangerous when they become obsessed with you. Most sociopaths go their entire life, and never kill anyone. Although they make life hell, and ruin many people. Many do not ever murder. An obsessed sociopath is dangerous because the fact is, they do not have a conscience. Since it is our conscience that keeps us from doing awful things to others, the sociopath is capable of almost anything. When a sociopath is stalking you, and has become obsessed with you. It's important that you live cautiously. Never forget what you are dealing with... A monster..

When you are the victim of a sociopath who is obsessed with controlling you, even though you ended the relationship. It's important to try to stay one step ahead of them. This can be difficult and exhausting, and not recommended, unless you feel you are being stalked by the sociopath. Being involved or around a sociopath for a long time, you will be able to see the patterns and can predict  some of their manipulation patterns and behaviors. Trying to stay one step ahead of the sociopath will eventually wreak havoc on your own sanity and health. So it is best to contact your local police department, let them be aware of the harassment. 

Most importantly DOCUMENT DOCUMENT DOCUMENT everything. Save emails, text, and record any phone calls, save any voice mails. You may need these things in order to file a protective order or restraining order against the sociopath, when they will not leave you alone. 

The sociopath will always have what seems to be a valid excuse to contact you. If you have children with the sociopath, the harassment you will get from the sociopath can cause stress, anger, frustration, depression, and even physical illness. Having children gives the sociopath a reason to contact you everyday.. Even though there is no reason to actually speak to your ex EVERY SINGLE DAY, the sociopath will find one – the children –

The sociopath is going to call, text and email just to bother you and annoy you most of the time. Sending text so minuscule like "Suzie has a dentist appointment today, and she is very scared of going" or "Bobby has a test in science and is worried he will fail". The strangest thing is when you speak with your children you will usually find out that Susie never went to the dentist. And bobby wasn't worried about a science test. The sociopath has no rhyme or reason why they send you text that are random and made up. It is just to disrupt your day. They hope you will respond, become upset (that your children are worried).

The sociopath loves keeping you on your toes and causing drama in your life. Even when you have moved on and they have moved on. They still want to bother you just because they can. They want to be able to feel that they have that control over you. They need to know that if they want to, they can disrupt your mind state, foil your plans, stress you out, cause chaos in your life, and control your emotions. 

They do this because they are disturbed people. They are desperate and pathetic. They do not realize what they are doing is harming their children emotionally. Most of the time the parent who is being harassed on a daily basis. Will feel anxiety and fear about having to deal with their ex spouse. They want to avoid the ex. Because of the constant contact and harassment. This affects the children, because they may not be able to see both parents as much. THE SOCIOPATH MAKES GETTING THE CHILDREN SO DIFFICULT, and So STRESSFUL. The other parent shuts down. They are emotionally drained after dealing with a psycho for so long. They even suffer from a form of Emotional PTSD. 

Once the sociopath sees that their ex is avoiding them. They will push even more. By be-littling, degrading, putting down, trying to instill shame and guilt about not being a good parent. How the children are embarrassed by their family and it is all that parents fault, because of the lack of co parenting. It is all a ploy to get control and to get that response. 

The best thing the parent who is being harassed can do is; do right by your children when they are with you. Know that you cannot control what the sociopath does. Taking the sociopath to court will only make the situation worse. Sociopaths are able to work the legal system and you will probably lose that battle. So don't take them to court unless you feel the children are being physically or sexually abused. Do the best you can for your children when they are in your care. DO NOT EVER speak negatively of the sociopathic parent. Just be the best parent you can be. 

AND ABOVE ALL IGNORE THE SOCIOPATH, CHANGE YOUR PHONE NUMBER IF YOU MUST. 

**NEVER ALLOW THE SOCIOPATH TO AFFECT YOUR LIFE, IT IS HARD BUT IF YOU MAINTAIN NO CONTACT THEN THEY ARE BASICALLY HAVING A CONVERSATION WITH THEMSELF EVERYTIME THEY CALL AND LEAVE A MESSAGE Or TEXT YOU 

Sociopaths and narcissist

When you're not accustomed to dealing with distorted personalities like the narcissist and the sociopath, you will be totally caught off guard - especially when you are a genuinely good person. It's hard to realize that their are people among us with NO conscience and No Guilt or remorse.. 

Narcissist and sociopaths create fear in good people. You see these people committ other atrocities (and get away with it). Why wouldn't the atrocities they are doing to you be any different. 

Your fear of the narcissist and sociopath is valid. It is not just a misplaced feeling. Your fear is a warning and it is entirely justified. 

The best thing you can do for you and your loved ones is to get away from the distorted person -NO MATTER WHAT. If that means moving - DO IT. 

Sociopaths and Narcissist are extremely dangerous. 

Sociopaths are Stalkers..

Cowardice - This is one of the major traits of a stalker/sociopath, rather if the obsessed stalker is on the street or online.  People with a stable mind, and who are emotionally and mentally healthy  have no need or desire to engage in stalker like behavior. 
When someone is truly being stalked or harassed, they will call the police, and take the legal measures necessary to protect themselves from a dangerous stalker. 

Many stalkers/sociopaths will vilify their victims. This is a common tactic they use. For example: to know if someone is being truthful about being stalked, they WILL NOT TAKE TO SOCIAL MEDIA TO DISCUSS IT. A person being stalked is usually frightened and afraid. They will try to hide from their stalker, they will not take to social media to announce that they have a stalker. 

*RED FLAG* - When you see a person claiming that "they are being stalked by a cyber troll, or mentally unstable person" - **THIS IS A RED FLAG**  
When a person is TRULY AFRAID they will NOT do anything to provoke the stalker. For example - they will NOT claim they have a Stalker, or use first and last names. When you see someone using a persons first and last name - it is usually in an effort to defame the person, accusing them of the exact behaviors they are inflicting on the REAL VICTIM. 

Facebook or twitter are a stalkers favorite way to keep up with their victim. And also it is a sociopaths favorite tool to slander and ruin the reputation of their victim - if someone's social media uses a persons full name negatively - THE SOCIOPATH WANTS TO VILIFY THE VICTIM SO THAT THEY LOSE SUPPORT OR CREDITABLY. Also female sociopaths Use their children to play victim. They know children are innocent, and they prey on people's kindness by saying "my kids are so scared of Firstname Lastname". They will exploit and use their kids to elicit pity from kind people. 

Real Victims DO NOT want to instigate or provoke the stalkers behavior. A PERSON BEING STALKED is afraid and should call the police and file a police report, to let the police be on alert about the situation. Speaking of the stalker 
on social media could put their families life and their own life in danger. 
Having a stalker can be a truly horrific ordeal. A person being stalker will keep a low profile and disappear from social media because they do not want their 
stalker to know what they are doing or where they are at.

**Also if a person has a blog and they are slandering and accusing someone of stalking or other unlawful acts on their blog - if you see that they have put the person full name in the "labels" section, so that if that persons googled - the negative info the sociopath has provided will be the first thing to come up**

SO ALWAYS REMEMBER THAT WHEN YOU SEE SOMEONE POSTING COMMENTS AND USING A PERSONS FIRST AND LAST NAME. THIS PERSON IS 99% MORE THAN LIKELY NOT BEING STALKED, BUT THEY ARE ACTUALLY THE PERPETRATOR AND THE STALKER. ** What they are doing is vilifying their victim, in order to convince others that they are the victim, so they can continue to stalk, harass, and mentally torment the real victim. This is a very common tactic of any sociopath. They are attempting to discredit the person they are stalking and harassing. BY DISCREDITING THE REAL VICTIM, IT GIVES THE STALKER SOCIOPATH MORE ACCESS TO CAUSE HARM TO THE VICTIM. They will accuse others or committing criminal acts but rarely take legal action. Because they know that if an investigation was to take place - THEY WILL BE EXPOSED AS THE ACTUAL PERPETRATOR. It is much easier to play victim and get pity from kind people.

The Internet is the perfect domain for the Stalker/Sociopath. The sociopath seeks to avoid all personal responsibility for her/his behavior.  Not only do “normal” people have no need to engage in stalking behavior but the intelligent, self-confident, well balanced person (one who can feel love, empathy, joy and compassion) wouldn’t even consider stalking another person.

The very thought of it would be abhorrent to them. ------------------------------------>>>For a sociopath however, stalking is like second nature to them; a 
skin they feel very comfortable in.

The ultimate coward stalker is the man or woman who stalks a former lover or spouse. And the worst of the worst cowardly stalkers actually stalk their former spouses/lovers NEW SPOUSE OR LOVE INTEREST. THIS IS TRUE PSYCHOPATHIC OBSESSION! The psychopath is not satisfied with stalking only their former spouse, they stalk their former spouses new lover or partner, because they want to know what their former spouse is doing, and know everything about the person they are doing it with. This is the most DANGEROUS of all situations, when the obsession has gone to these extremes.  Unfortunately this can result in a homicide. The stalker/sociopath murders their former lover/spouse and also the former spouses new partner. Since the sociopath is such a coward, they will usually takes his or her own life to avoid prison, and all responsibility.  They take their own life NOT because they feel ANY REMORSE or GUIL for the person they slaughtered, or the lives they have destroyed. They do it to avoid 
being held legally responsible for their actions. When you think stalker, also think coward. They are one and the same. This also means that cowards, in the right circumstances and possessing the right frame of (twisted) mind can be extremely dangerous, even those who have never before committed of a serious crime of violence. (That only means they haven't been caught yet for their disgusting and perverse behaviors) 

*¡!¡* I am going to post more on this subject later. I have a good friend who has been accused of stalking by her husbands, ex wife. This woman(the ex wife) has taken slander and false accusations to a new extreme of creepy and dangerous. She is accusing my friend who I have known for about 20 years, of stalking her. She claims to be scared for her life and her children's life (red flag) If this deranged and mentally unstable woman is so afraid for herself and her children - why does she make post on Facebook about her children's life and activities. If she is being stalked she would not be giving out so much personal information of where abouts. Also she has no problem with my friend picking her children up from school. What this psycho ex wife is doing is attempting to ruin my friends reputation, because she is jealous of the fact that she married her ex husband, although the ex wife is remarried as well... She has been diagnosed with borderline personality disorder (so her mother and other family members have reported) but it is a clear case of sociopathic disorder. Sociopaths are rarely diagnosed because they can fool the most qualified psychiatrist. So it is a hard diagnosis to make ..

Female sociopaths are more dangerous than males

Male sociopaths are dangerous, but female sociopaths are even more dangerous. Our society has more protections available for female sociopaths than the males ones due to traditional norms held by society. Generally, women are viewed as nurturers, caregivers, compassionate, and the primary pillars holding up their families. However, in reality, there are a lot of women that fail to meet those standards. They get joy from breaking down others, playing mind games to deteriorate a person’s sense of worth or get people to join their mission. These women are treacherous, remorseless, 
leeches, narcissistic, and lack the ability to emotionally connect with others. Thus, making them a danger to their significant other (or husband), children and anyone of their targets (or projects). Dr. Robert D. Hare, a psychopath expert and an author ofWithout Conscience The Disturbing World of the Psychopaths Among Us, “believes that about 1% of the population fits the profile of [sociopath], 
and male [sociopaths] are 7 times more common than female [sociopaths].

Female Sociopaths are much more subtle, covert, and manipulative than their male counter parts. They wouldn't dare pick another sociopath as a partner. They prefer men who are kind, compassionate, forgiving, and have the ability to feel guilt. They choose someone that is stable and hardworking, so that they forgive their affairs, or so that they can use their children as pawns against them the rest of their life to get what they want - money, bills paid, etc... Basically the father will be taking care of the children, and the mother wants the status quo of "wonderful doting mommy" while she does nothing.

Healthy, real relationships are built on mutual respect and trust; they are based on sharing honest thoughts and feelings. The reason the sociopath is so dangerous because she Is able to convince you that you are being in an honest thoughtful and genuine relationship, for as long as she must until it's yo late.. Then when you realize what you are dealing with and what has happened you are so confused, so scattered, trying yo put together the pieces, she is tying up any loose ends to destroy your creditability you may use against her..

Dr. Hare goes on to say that the psychopathic bond can take place very quickly, sometimes within hours. That means it could happen over coffee, drinks, in a business meeting or, as Dr. Hare mentions, on a cross-country airplane trip.

The abandonment phase begins when the psychopath decides that their victim is no longer useful. They abandon their vicim and move on to someone else. In the case of romantic relationshps, a psychopath will usually seal a relationship with their next target before abandoning their current victim. Abandonment can happen quickly and can occur without the current victim knowing that the psychopath was looking for someone new. There will be no apologies for the hurt and pain they cause because psychopaths do not appreciate these emotions.