Friday, February 14, 2014

Victims of sociopaths become strong survivors

The sociopath sees you as someone that they own. After they have discarded you, they then need to destroy you. We already know that there are some people who are serial killers. Most Sociopaths are not like this. In fact a lot are not even violent. What this type of Sociopath will do is to ruin and damage your emotional state, your life, and damage or destroy everything left that you ‘value’ so that you are left feeling absolutely destroyed (metaphorically killed). Whilst the sociopath will not destroy you and kill you in a literal sense, they kill you in another way.
You should remember in the beginning, when the Sociopath mirrored you, acting just like you, mirroring you to offer you everything that you wanted. Moving on from that the Sociopath played victim, you felt sorry for him/her and they ‘exposed’ their weaknesses and vulnerabilities (which were mostly manipulative lies), you felt safe to expose your own weaknesses.
It is now those very weaknesses that the Sociopath uses to control you. He/she will threaten to expose you and will lie about you, using a thread of truth to make the lies that they tell sound believable.
The Sociopath has no conscience. So she does not feel bad about terrorizing your life. He does not feel remorse, guilt or shame. The sociopath will continue to make your life hell, until in her mind you are literally “dead”
That's when the smear campaign starts. The sociopath will spread lies to make you feel alienated from your friends and the community. By the time you realize what is happening - the damage is already done. The worst thing you can do is get angry and react to the sociopath. That's what they want you to do is to lose your temper and act out. Then they will say "I told you that they are crazy, look at how she I going off on me, and I haven't done anything wrong". They taunt you til you break no when you break and react they play the victim, all while vilifying you. 

Unfortunately, you are left disarmed when this happens to you. There is little that you can do about it. After all, you are not the master manipulator, the sociopath is. The worse thing is if you have been unfortunate to meet more than one sociopath in a row. This makes the sociopath’s job relatively easy, as they can build on lies told by the previous one.
Even if this hasn’t happened. And this is the first one that you have met, he will continue 
with his hate campaign against you, whilst smiling with kind eyes, and appearing to be the 
victim, and ‘caring about you’. Yes that is right, the sociopath will NOT talk about you in an “attacking way”. Often, he will act as rescuer and carer for your friends. Selling them information that they need to hear, to heal the hurt that they feel about your rejection of them.
For you, this can be absolutely devastating. In truth you have been involved in an abusive relationship, where you were used, abused, and controlled. You now want to go back to your old life. You need grounding and reality. So you reach out for help. But face third party abuse.
You sink further down. Things cannot get possibly worse, you think.
That is the truth. Things CAN’T get worse!
Coming out of the other side, is like passing through a storm. You are stronger than you think you are. Remember this:

~Just salvage what you can. Focus on the inner YOU. Remember that true happiness, comes from within. Only YOU can make YOU happy. Nobody else.
~Yes, it is hurtful, but this is exactly what the sociopath operates on. Causing hurt, pain  and damage. So that they can make themselves feel better about their own actions.
~If you are reading this, if you can identify with this, if this has happened to you. Even if you feel alone and isolated after this has happened. Take heart. You are not alone. I write this, as it happened to me. Just as it has happened to me, it has happened also to millions of victims all over the world.
~You are not a victim, you are a survivor. Try not to think about others reactions and don’t fight back. Fighting back will simply reinforce the lies that the sociopath is telling about you, especially if you lose your temper.
~Take time out to focus on yourself. Learn to trust you again. Leave it a while, let the dust settle. Remember that you can never change someone else. But you can change you.
**Also remember this – lies will take speed….. but the truth will always have endurance!!!

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