Sunday, August 3, 2014

The narcissist lives in a meaningless wasteland

Narcissist people are deceptive liars. Being with a narcissist is painful, and at times you can feel like you are the crazy one! When you are not aware of what narcissism is. Having little knowledge of personality disorders, such as a sociopathic, psychopathic, and narcissistic, makes you feel like there is something wrong with you. The narcissist is so quick to lie, and will put all the blame on you, leaving you feeling guilty for even confronting them. This can be confusing for the person who feels they are being betrayed and lied to. Eventually the persons self esteem begins to erode away. They don't understand why they are ignored, and put down. They believe something is wrong with them. So they try even harder to please the narcissist. 
Only to be more rejected by the narcissist. 

So why would a person continue to stay in a relationship that is so emotionally abusive and damaging to their personal growth? 
I believe it stems from the person being rejected by a parent, or from many rejections in their past. Rejection hurts the rejected person so badly, they feel  as long as the narcissist hasn't left them yet, that feel that they can change the narcissist, and one day the narcissist will see how much they care for them, and the narcissist will change. 
Unfortunately this will never happen...  

Narcissistic personalities CANNOT and will not ever change. They have an ego so large, it doesn't allow them to see anything but the superficial, and what is most beneficial for them and their ego. 

Narcissist Do Not think there is anything wrong with them. If a narcissist seeks therapy, it is only because they have been forced, by someone who financially supports them or holds some other power over them. They will never genuinely try to get help, because they don't think they need help.  They believe that the problem is not them. They are perfect. The problem is everyone else.  Specifically they think the people who are asking them to seek professional help. The person most affected by the narcissist is his spouse or significant other. 
To the rest of the world the narcissist will portray himself as the nice guy, and can usually get along with anyone. The narcissist has no real sense of who he or she is.  

Narcissist are compulsive liars. These people have made such a habit out of lying, their entire existence is built solely on lies. They live a life of deceit. Narcassist (and sociopaths) live in an a false reality that they start to believe. They lie about anything and everything. They are making it up as they go. They will go to extremes to lie. Anything from lying about where they work, (in an attempt to make it seem like they are hard working, interesting people - which they are not) They are actually lazy individuals who are looking for a handout
A narcissist will lie about everything. They become such bold liars, they will make up things that can be easily proved wrong. For example, the narcissist says things that they believe will make then look good, like they wrote a book and got the book published, and it was on the NY times best seller, but all the money the book made, she/he donated to the neo-natal unit at the hospital. Why would someone lie about something like this? Since it can be proved that it isn't true? It's because they have lied so long, and no one has ever held them accountable, they see themselves as invisible to being caught. So they tell the most extreme lies.  Most psychiatrist call these people “delusional”. 
It is the person in a relationship with this disordered individual that suffers the most. Being with a pathological liar can ruin your life and the lives of those around you. 

So what is the reason narcissist lies?
It is complicated but quite simple to understand why the narcissist and the sociopath habitually lies to everyone. First and foremost they are in love with themselves.. 
Since they usually don't have much truth that verifies how wonderful they are. They must make up their own truth. Narcissist also never want to be wrong, so if they have to lie in order to prove they are right then they have no qualms about doing so. Narcissist also feel entitled to have whatever they want. If lying gets them what they want then they will not think twice about lying. Lying comes so natural to these types of personalities. It's second nature to them.  Narcissists must make every situation all about them.. 
The narcissist never thinks to himself, “how will this impact the people in my life?”  The narcissist will never worry about the consequences of lying. 
Narcissist are so shallow that they cannot see any further than their own nose. They only focus on the immediate gratification they want. Narcissists like sociopaths are always looking for the easy way out of a situation. 

The truth is the narcissist will never have a healthy relationship with anyone. It is impossible to have a long-term, healthy relationship built on mutual trust and honesty with a narcissist because they are all compulsive liars and they live such a shallow existence.  They are never able to accept that all their failed relationships is because of their own flawed personality. They believe they are perfect.

Narcissist are essentially only in a relationship with themselves. 

The narcissist is actually a coward. They lack the courage to look at the truth. Anyone who believes that they do not have to accept any responsibilty for anything in their life, is a coward. Narcassists are covert cowards. Narcissist will say what they think will get them back on good graces with a person, but as soon as you accept a narcissist back. It is not long before they are back to doing what led to you trying to end the relationship in the first place.  Liars are very hard to love. They will perpetually frustrate you. Instead of admitting their flaws, shortcomings, and their failures  {which is what makes us human} The narcissist will lie in order to cover it up. They’re so busy keeping up appearances that they destroy their closest relationships in the process. Narcissist rarely (I'm talking about RARELY - almost never) will change. It takes courage to admit wrong, and a narcissist is a coward. So they will always live a lifestyle of deceit and denial. 

Narcissist live meaningless lives.

If everything in your life was suddenly taken away from you. Like your fancy car, nice home, your high paying career...  What do you have besides your good name or your reputation? Narcassistic people have essentially burned all bridges and alienated everyone they have ever known.  They have lied and deceived so many people and caused so much emotional damage. 
They eventually self destruct and destroy their own reputations. They have ruined their own name in the community. 
Narcissist never form any real connections with anyone. The narcissists life becomes nothing more than a meaningless wasteland. As they age they  are easily forgotten and dismissed. No one with any real discernment will trust them. The narcissist will end up isolated and ostracized in their lifestyle of lies and deceit. 
Even then, they are unable to see why their life has ended up so miserable... They blame their pathetic life on their last lover, or on their parents, or on the “asshole” boss who fired them and couldn't see their potential. It's always someone else's fault. 

If you suspect you are in a relationship with someone who is a narcassist, get out now. It will save you a lot of heart ache and disappointment to leave sooner than later. They will never change. You cannot change them. No one can.

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