Tuesday, October 7, 2014


No contact gives you the space and time to get your energy back into your life. It can be challenging at first as you may have to resist the urge to answer the phone or return an email or text message. You must get into the habit of policing your self for your own good. Imagine that you have two different aspects of yourself; A parent self and a child self. The parent self will have to police the child self to be sure she doesn't do anything that will hurt her. You know intellectually that breaking the rules of no contact will hurt the child so you stop her from doing so even though she is throwing a tantrum.

Making a decision to cut off contact with a narcissistic personality disordered individual, when leaving the relationship is an important part of your recovery process. The decision to initiate “no contact” is a decision for your health and sanity.

When you remain in contact you continue to engage in the relationship on some level and are still affected by the craziness and the dysfunction.  You will normally continue to be affected by the hot and cold behavior of these sociopathic narcissist, they will always try to pull you in and then push you away, and you will constantly feel confused and 
hurt. This sociopathic narcissist will continue to drain all your energy which results in depression and lethargy.

It is very hard to maintain “no contact” when it comes to the narcissistic sociopath. When they realize that you have decided to move on and you no longer are willing to play their game, they will continue to try to get a response from you. They will sound sincere. They may sound apologetic. They will always have a reason that sounds plausible are perfectly innocent to why they are contacting you. 

It is important that you not be taking in by all their efforts, because they really are not sincere and they are not apologetic. 
It is all an act in order to pull you back into their web of crazy. 

It is important to remember that they will never change. They will always be dysfunctional, deceitful, and the lying individual they have always been. They will always be evil. They will always blame everyone else for everything that has happened. They were never in their life take any responsibility for anything.

You are a thoughtful, kind, and empathetic person. You are compassionate and you care for the feelings of others. That is why  it is difficult for you to ignore someone and cut off contact with them, especially since that someone was a person that you once loved and you thought loved you too. As hard as it may be to accept, you must acknowledge and accept that they never loved you. They only  used to you, and when they got bored they moved on to what they thought was more “exciting”. And as twisted as it may be even though they have found something more exciting, they still want to control you. 
When you cut off all contact with them, you take your power back. They cannot control you if you have no contact with them. In order to move on and be happy you MUST TAKE YOUR POWER BACK, and stop giving them your power by falling into their trap they have set for you. 

The sociopath has drained your energy, love of life, confidence, self worth for long enough! No contact gives you the upper hand. You will start to feel better about yourself, and begin to smile again once you cut off all contact. 

1 comment:

  1. My girlfriends ex husband fits this profile. His wife was found hanging in their basement. The police don't suspect foul play. How is it this kind of abuse is allowed to go on? He has full access to children. No one seems to care.