How the Female Narcissist Operates

The female narcissist is jealous of you.  She is jealous of who you are and what you have. She is jealous of other females. She does not have many female friends because it's difficult for her to maintain female friendships because her jealously comes out and most women do not want to keep that kind of friend in their circle. If you invited her into your circle, when you did not know what kind of female you were dealing with, she may have already started triangulation within your circle. Telling one person this, and another person else. Then turning those people against each other so that they do not speak. If they were to speak with one another - her lies would be exposed.  So always communicate in a group setting with any problems that are arising. 

You think your problems with the high school petty drama, were over in high school, right? Wrong, if a female narcissist has entered your life. 

A female narcissist will bring all that drama in, she always has and always will. She is not capable of having normal relationships with other females. Just like she can't be in a normal and healthy relationship with men.  

If you have caught on to her behavior, and she is unable to continue to manipulate and control the situation or you. She will attempt to control you another way. That is usually by controlling how others view you.  She will control you behind the scenes. By turning your fiends and others against you with lies. She will spread lies about you to your work. She will attempt to destroy you in the most covert way. After all she cannot allow you to possibly expose her for the evil manipulative human she is. She was prepared for this to happen long before you were. So the lies she began telling about you began long you became suspicious of her.  She was prepared to get revenge on you before things began to fall apart. 

She does so many manipulative, calculated, and underhanded things, the victims find themselves on the defense. Under normal circumstances, you wouldn’t feel insecure or like people were turning against you. But because your ex has etched it into your brain that you are at fault. You have begun to question everything about yourself. 

Don't question yourself. Go with your first instinct, trust your intuition. If you think this disordered soulless person is doing these awful things to you (even you have no proof) - they probably are!

Either way, the desired result is that you feel anxious, suspicious, and insecure about every little thing. You may even begin to feel guilty about your jealous thoughts and doubtful of your ability to act “normal”.  When and if you do confront the Narcissist/sociopath about your suspicions, she'll call you delusional or needy or bi-polar. 

The narcissist accuses you of everything that she really is herself. She also will do to you everything she accuses you of. 

So be alert and listen when she accuses you of something - because that accusation is about to happen to you! 

She will never admit to anything at all. She is able to look at you in the eyes with no emotion and claim she doesn’t have the slightest clue what you’re talking about…

The lies, rumors and pain that come with a sociopath

 When we have been abused, betrayed, lied to, cheated on, had rumors spread about us, lost friends, felt isolated, been afraid, lost everything, doubted ourselves, felt guilty, believed it was our fault - more than likely we were in a relationship with a sociopath. Or we were friends, or have a sociopathic family member.  

Once we discovered the truth, and realized we are not the only victim of this person, who had some how destroyed our life, our soul, and left us with little to no trust in the world. We are able to begin healing from the traumatic experience. Healing takes time. We are weak, alone, afraid, and don't know who we can trust.

The hardest part of healing is feeling safe and facing the world. 

We want to withdraw, because the sociopath has said so many horrible things about us, we feel shame. AND THIS IS EXACTLY WHAT THE SOCIOPATH WANTS US TO FEEL. 

When my sociopath spread rumors about me all over town — to my child's  school, to my neighbors, to people who i respected in the community. I was afraid to leave the house. I was afraid of what others were thinking about me. What lies had my sociopath told everyone? And did anyone believe those lies. My sociopath alread had a reputation in town for stealing, and abusing drugs and sleeping around, so why would people believe the lies that were being  spread?

I felt that people would rather believe the bad they have heard about you - rather than the good. It seems people don't go around talking about the good about you. But they will go around talking about anything bad about you - even if it's not true.

For a while I felt isolated from the world. I did not want to leave my home. 

Even though the people who knew me, knew the hardships I had been through with this sociopath. They new that this person was very dangerous and hated me for moving on with my life. The sociopath wanted and still wants to hurt me, and make my life unbearable. I'm not sure why.. Boredom, or because I moved on and found someone who loves me for me and we were happy. 

What I have noticed is that all Sociopaths are jealous of everyone. 

Since there is nothing real authentic and genuine about the sociopath, and they don't understand or care to understand emotions. They just see everyone as a conquest, or threat. Not as humans, who feel pain. There is not much "humanness" in a sociopath.. And when they get done with you, you may feel they stole some part of your humanness.

A close friend of mine has been dealing with a vindictive female sociopath.  It is his ex wife. He has been divorced from the sociopath for over 9 years and separated for over 14. She had numerous affairs after they adopted their 2nd child. Finally after one of the affairs became very public due to the fact the man she was cheating with was married, and they both held prominant careers in the community, he filed for divorce. He has been through hell and back. This is his story, in his words...

  

When I went no contact and chose to ignore my sociopath, that's when things got very ugly. I refused 

to communicate with the ex. So my ex decided to tell everyone, and put it on social media that i was a "cyber stalking troll". Even using my first and last name to slander me. My ex made up a fake domain site in my name. Pretending to be me, and impersonating me in an unfavorable manner.  Basically painting a picture of a very unstable person, that was trying to get help for my mental problems. The worst part was if you googled my name, the website that my ex started about me was the first thing that came up. That is  when I said “ENOUGH IS ENOUGH.”

I contacted a friend of mine who is a police officer. And I ask what could be done about this website that my ex started about and was impersonating me in such a way. It was slander and defamation.

My friend informed me that it was cyber stalking, and I should file a police report. — so I did 

that. 

Which only made my ex crazier. Although the website was taken down, I was now being

accused of more horrific things. Now my sociopath ex wife was going to social media, claiming how she felt afraid for her children, because I was unstable, she believed I would kidnap them at a soccer game or from school. This was horrible because I felt afraid to go to my sons soccer game, because I didn't know what she would do or say, she had went to Facebook, and Twitter pretending to be living a life of fear because of me. 

What I began to notice was a pattern. She may have went to social media bashing me, but she expected me to pick up kids on my weekend. This is when I realized how unstable and deranged she was. She was only looking to ruin my reputation in the community, she still expected me to get the kids (even though she claimed she was in fear for their safety) 

I felt confused. I wanted to get my children. But with the unpredictable ex, I didn't know if I was being set up. Was I going to show up at the school to get my children, and the cops would be waiting to arrest me? Would my kids even be there, considering she loved leading me on wild gooses chases just to waste my time and make things difficult on me? 

I decided my children were worth whatever risk. And after all I had filed a complaint against her for impersonation and cyber stalking (which set her off to go on a rampant on social media) Bit it was still documentation, if my ex had something sinister planned. I remember so many times going to pick them up, feeling so much anxiety. Anxiety and fear consumed me. This woman had no limits and would not hesitate to destroy me, my new wife, and even my step daughter, who was at the time very little (5 years old). Sociopaths are so low, they will destroy children (even their own) just to hurt another person. 

I wondered if this crap would ever stop. I felt hopeless... I began to stop looking online, and begin to focus only on myself my children and healing. It was very tempting to want to get online and see what my ex was saying now.but I never did. I gave it a good eight months before I looked at anything my ex was doing online. I still do not look up my ex'a online activity. 

Why the Sociopath makes Life Hell...

No matter how you try to have NO COMMUNICATION with the sociopath, narcissist, psychopath. They will always still try to talk to you. They will stalk you online, send you text message (the first will be nice, as they are trying to get you to respond. After they realize your not going to respond to them — the text messages turn Hostile)

A sociopath will never stop trying to destroy you. Especially if you share children with them, or if you married their ex spouse, whom they share children with. Usually they are busy making their ex-spouses life hell. As soon as the ex-spouse of the sociopath remarries or gets in a serious relationship. The sociopath turns their focus and rage onto the ex-spouses new love.

Why does the sociopath do this? 

When the sociopath has ties to their Ex-spouse (such as children) the sociopath actually feels entitled to control their ex spouse forever by using the children against them. (This is more common in female sociopaths than the male) The female sociopath will see the new woman in her ex husband's life and children's life as a threat to her. She knows that her control of him may become harder, with his new wife's influence now on him. So she starts "damage control" as soon as she hears he is dating someone. She wants to destroy the relationship by either making life hell and hoping the new love in her ex spouses life will leave. Or by destroy her ex-husbands new love'a reputation. 

She will also make getting the children difficult, make everything 100 times as hard. She does this to make her ex husband see that everything was easier before he was in a new relationship. She will even say "we use to get along before you got married". The ex husband knows better. He remembers how she made his life miserable before he remarried. And they only got along when he gave her more money, and did what she told him to do. He basically paid her for peace. (The sociopath may seem delusional but she knows exactly what she is doing - she knows that she made life hell, before the new woman, and she is still making life hell now). 

The other reason the sociopath targets the ex- spouses new partner is JEALOUSY.  (This is also more common in female sociopaths than males)

The sociopath is jealous of her ex's new wife. Maybe she is younger, more ambitious, honest, the children like her, everyone seems to like her, and she makes the sociopaths ex happy. 

The sociopath does not want her ex to be happy. She has worked so hard for him to be miserable. Even when she was the cheater, liar, and the one who caused the demise of the marriage - and now she is even remarried to the man she was cheating with! It doesn't matter to the sociopath. She has no compassion for ANYONE. She has no conscience. She Never thinks about the pain she has inflicted on her children or her ex. She only thinks about the pain she wants to inflict. 

It takes a truly strong, confident, and secure person to deal with being the target of your husbands sociopathic ex wife. The sociopath will accuse you of being jealous of her, stalking her, being insecure, mentally unstable — basically everything she is. She is just projecting it onto you (the new wife of her ex)  because she knows how manipulative she is and sees the new wife as an easy target. Most genuinely good people have a hard time dealing with such abuse and exploitation. But all good people are not weak. They are strong. As long as you realize you are not dealing with a normal person, but a cold and cruel sociopath, and you have knowledge on these types of people. You will be better equip to handle it.